There's nothing like a neighborhood tavern for inexpensive, strong drinks and few, if any, guys who look like this. Last night I went to Seidenfadens, pictured above, to hear Johnny Berry and the Outliers, who play country music like Hank Williams, Sr. and Johnny Cash played it, only they aren't dead.
"Hey," you may be asking yourself, "isn't Seidenfaden the German word for shameful joy?" No, that's schadenfreude. Seidenfaden was the last name of the guy who opened the tavern in 1921. I think he's buried somewhere behind the bar.
I was really only going to have a drink or too, honestly. But then the music started playing, the crowd got rowdy, and the bourbon started flowing. I don't remember a lot about the last few hours of the night, other than the following:
-I think I made passes at girls with big asses.
-I ate a diet-busting burrito. It was probably good; I seriously don't recall.
-I fell down. This actually happened, because I have the scrapes and bruises to prove it. As clumsy as I am, this is only the second time I've fallen while drunk. The first time, I fell out of my chair at a casino bar. My brother was there to witness that one. This time, I fell at the residence of the good people who let me crash on their futon. Unfortunately, I crashed on their hallway floor first. I hope I didn't weaken the foundation of their house.
The next time I go to Seidenfadens and/or see Johnny Berry and the Outliers, I'm either going to drink less or wear this suit.
9 Comments:
It's very kind of you to help me with my Flash Fiction Friday.
I enjoy douchebag-free zones.
Enjoy those drunken making-passes-at-girls-with-big-asses nights while you can. Once we're married there will be none of that!
One, see, I TOLD you Jo wants to marry you. You can still use my back yard for the reception if you want.
Two, were the bruises/scrapes on your knees? Because falling might not be the cause.
That was a terrible tumble at the GVR bro! You were just sitting there and as if you were in slow motion, just slumped off the chair and onto the floor. Ahhh memories.
That chick in the Sumo suit has the same look on her face as that Rick Pitino ad we saw about 10 years ago where he looked like he just smelled the worst fart ever.
I woulda had your back, man. I owe you for the famous Kentucky Der-bacle in 1983. Those chicks I puked on would have had me killed and dismembered if I was there alone. So, next time just call me up and I'll hop a plane. Or not. But I will seriously consider it at the very least.
I heard about that John. I heard you were piss drunk at 9 am and bazooka barfed all over two butch lesbians. Todd did say they were ready to kill you, but he convinced them you were "special." Hilarious!
"Seidenfaden" means silk thread. Just so you know.
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