Monday, September 08, 2008
Sure-fire conversation enders
Yeah, I know I've been laying the political stuff on pretty thick on this blog, but in real life I normally don't like talking politics. Specifically, I don't like being forced to listen to empty Fox News talking points. I have a few responses that almost always end the conversation.

Amateur Fox News Correspondent: "I don't trust Barack Obama. He's a Muslim."

Me: "I hope he's a radical Muslim. DEATH TO AMERICA!"

That usually makes them leave my presence, which is all I really want. Another example:

Amateur Fox News Correspondent: "I really like that Sarah Palin. She gave a great speech at the convention."

Me: "I hear her pussy smells like pickled eggs."

Feel free to use these sure-fire conversation enders; my treat.


10 Comments:

Thanks, will do!

Blogger Dale said...

I can't figure out why you don't charge for these services. I will freely use these.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

I hear Palin is a lesbian who used Michael Moore's donated sperm to impregnate herself just so she could get an abortion en route to an American Atheist's meeting where they were serving wine and cheese and talking about elitist stuff.

Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

Also: "You know, that snopes link on your Obama-is-a-terrorist e-mail actually proves everything you say is false."

Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

"I don't read Death Wore a Feathered Mullet" also kills any conversation I'm having.

Blogger Melliferous Pants said...

Since I'm going to be one of your top 5 wives does this mean you'll bail me out of jail when they arrest me for using the Sarah Palin picked eggs line?

Blogger lostinutah said...

In Utah, really all you have to do is say mildly, "Really? I donate to Obama's campaign."

THEY RUN! Trust me!

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

I think those would make great conversation starters as well, given the right situation.

Blogger Johnny Yen said...

My god, how did I ever manage my life before I discovered your blog?

God bless you. I mean, "Allah be praised!"

Blogger Tits McGee said...

DEATH TO AMERICA!

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