Saturday, June 03, 2006
June's Right-Wing Douchebag of the Month

It's still early in June, but not too early to name Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas Right-Wing Douchebag of the Month.

In 2000, Thomas cast the deciding vote in Gore v. Bush, giving Florida and the Presidency to our current "leader". To be fair, all of the Justices selected by Democratic presidents voted in favor of Gore, and all selected by Republican presidents chose Bush. How surprising. But Thomas shouldn't have voted. The day after Bush was declared the winner, Thomas' wife Virginia was named director of the Bush White House Transition Team. Conflict of interest, anyone?

But the one thing, in my opinion, that forever brands Judge Thomas as a world class douchebag, occurred during his confirmation hearings.

After a day or two of testimony and questioning regarding sexual harassment allegations against him, Clarence Thomas announced that the proceedings were nothing more than "a high-tech lynching of an uppitity black man."

Bravo, because it worked. As soon as those spineless pseudo-liberals on the Senate Judiciary Committee heard the word "lynching" they backed the fuck off.

As a white man, I may have no right to say what I'm about to say, but it's my dying blog, so here goes. A lot of people made sacrifices and risked their lives so Clarence Thomas could have the opportunities he's had in life. A lot of civil rights martyrs actually were lynched; lynched as in hung from a fucking tree by a wild mob of hilljack savages, not inconvenienced by millionaires in front of television cameras.

Those people gave their lives so one day Clarence Thomas could go to Yale and become a lawyer and eventually a judge. He repaid them with a constant stream of piss throughout his judicial career, always siding against them in favor of interests that would have, just decades before, denied him the right to vote. But the mothercuntfucking moment he was in trouble he played the "lynching" card. FUCK HIM.

I'll never forget a picture I saw of Clarence Thomas standing between Senators Jessie Helms and Strom Thurmond, his arms placed around two of the most notorious racists and segregationists our country has known.

I actually shouted at the picture "Hey, Thomas, THOSE GUYS FUCKING HATE YOU. They don't think you're human because of the color of your skin. They don't want your children to go to school with their grandchildren."

Clarence Thomas knew they hated him, but he stood there with a big smile plastered on his face, openly defecating on the graves of those he would one day use to save his ass.


Blogger Brookelina said...

You are my hero. This post should be in Time magazine.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

As awful as the privileged set is in defending its self-interest, this guy is worse because of the reasons you just said.

Come have some pie. You deserve it.

Strom Thurmond used to be a Democrat and had a long-time black mistress. I love that. And let's not forget that the Dem party has its share of racists too. Sen. Robert Byrd (D-WV) used to be in the KKK. It's true. A few years ago in a television interview he said something to the effect that there were "white niggers" too. One of the funniest moments of unintended honesty spilling out of a politician's mouth in recent memory.

And no, I'm not a Republican. Both parties elect pieces of shit to represent them. We get the government we deserve.

Blogger Spirit Of Owl said...

The man is utterly indefensible. It's hideous that he can so devalue the life and death of so many people with nothing more than his "position."

Let's just put it this way-when REHNQUIST goes over to side with J.P. Stevens and the only 2 dissenting are Scalia and Thomas and Thomas's opinion is more vicious (if even written as opposed to just concurring with Scalia's) have the two biggest douches that ever walked into the Supreme Court.

Blogger Knitty Kitty said...

I don't know when I love you more, when you go off on great rants about day to day shit, or when you go off on great rants about political shit.

Why have you slighted me again bro?I make Clarence Thomas look like Howard "Yeeeeaahh" Dean! Maybe I'll make the July RWDBOTM. It's something to shoot for.

Blogger Chris said...

But why the picture of Danny Glover?

I'll get my coat

Blogger JJ said...

He is a seriously craven cynic who would do anything for power. Would say anything for power, for instance his claim during the hearings that he has never had a thought about Roe V. Wade. How could we put such a malignant liar on our highest court's bench?

Look at the other retards the Republicans put there. They want puppets who are beholden to them, not jurists.

Oh c'mon, seriously. Do you really think it's ONLY Republicans who put people on the court who have agendas and are worthless piles of dung? Both parties do it, of course. Oh, and don't forget that no Supreme Court Justice gets to sit there until he or she has been confirmed by the US Senate. And Thomas was confirmed by a Senate that was run by the Democrats. So if you hate him so much, equal blame goes to the Dem Senators who voted for him.

Blogger Karen said...

I've always felt that this douchebag was a pig. A big fat sell-out pig.

Blogger Violet said...

That's what I think is so interesting about you - you seem so convinced of peoples' unworthiness, and yet you still expect individual people to be thoughtful, moral, caring, and appreciative. For such a cynical guy, this seems so...optimistic...

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