Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Cuntionary
Wikipedia refers to the word cunt as "the last genuinely unprintable and unutterable expletive."

Well, it isn't unprintable here. We at DWAFM (meaning me; don't hold anyone else responsible for this crap) use the word in many different forms. Here are a few examples of fun, family-friendly uses for cunt.

cuntastic
Usage: "That guy's whiny rant at Starbucks was absolutely cuntastic."

stumblecunt
A person who drinks to the point of not being able to walk without assistance. We've all been there at some point, but true stumblecunts make it a way of life.
See also, Lohan, Lindsay.

cuntourage
a group of hot, scantily clad women and one guy.
Usage: "Did you see the cuntourage surrounding that lucky son of a bitch?"

mancunt
See also, Cruise, Tom.

cuntalicious
Like Fergalicious, only not as smelly.

cuntastrophe
A person who has really let him/herself go downhill.
Usage: "Has Katie Holmes lost about fifty pounds lately? She's a total cuntastrophe."

There are also phrases such as For the love of cunt; For cunt's sake; In Cunt We Trust; and mothercuntingfuck!

I hope this will help you offend innocent people and/or get fired from your job. You're welcome.


30 Comments:

Blogger miss kendra said...

probably with the fired thing.

oh well.

(i would like to be in a cuntourage. i think. i feel weird saying so.)

Blogger Brookelina said...

You're never going to get any pussy with a post like this.

Blogger Miss Natalie said...

cuntourage - gold!

Blogger Übermilf said...

Cunstantinople.

Cuntaloupe.

Cuntstable.

Cunstspiracy.

Blogger Alex said...

Goddammit. I thought I invented "cuntastic" the other day.
Shows what I know.

Blogger The Stormin Mormon said...

I do use the word cunt to define those that I truly hate. It carries so much more weight than "bitch" or "skank" or "congressman."

You forgot my favorite of all, Cuntagious! As in, "That chicks raging case of herpes in Cuntagious!"

Blogger Princess Pointful said...

I just found your blog (well, the temptation of a feathered mullet proved too tempting to deny) and you may be my new favourite.
Coming up with new profanities is one of my favourite hobbies!

Blogger rhiann carnated said...

my drinking buddy refers to his ex as the "lying cuntress" and I always thought that was the best nickname ever.

Blogger wmy said...

You know what Todd? Not a day goes by that I do not drop to my knees and thank the LORD ALMIGHTY for your filthy, filthy mind, and your fabulously filthy writing abilities...I love you man!! But your still not getting my bud light...that just popped into my head...I know, I know, quit bothering you with my pointless drivel...will I ever learn?? Probably not! hahahahahahah

Blogger Nick said...

Nobody gets as much mileage out of the word cunt, than you.

You're such a one cunt pony.

Blogger Kate said...

take a bow. it's well deserved. lol.

where do you come up with this shit?

Blogger katarina said...

I'm always looking for new ways to offend people.

Blogger Melliferous Pants said...

adcuntable!

Blogger Tracy said...

Twat did you say? I cunt hear you.
Your favorite tree is the cuntree
oh my. I guess i should start looking for a new job.

Blogger afromabq said...

you're so damn funny - seriously, how do you do it??

Blogger Spinning Girl said...

This is cuntificent. Cuntsacional! Cunterrific!

Blogger miss kendra said...

nick called you a one cunt pony.

haha.

Blogger Cincysundevil said...

This post was completely cuntspirational!

Blogger Nick said...

I did. It was easily the most humorous comment so far.

Blogger Übermilf said...

Nick's head is swelling even larger than usual.

Freak.

Blogger yournamehere said...

kendra,
you would be the shinning epicenter of any cuntourage.

brooke,
yeah, that's the reason I'm not going to get any pussy. My horrid looks and abrasive personality have nothing to do with it.

natalie,
a good cuntourage is more valuable than gold.

ubie,
thanks for your cuntribution.

stormin,
what if the congressman is a cunt? Like Trent Lott, for example.

vast,
you are right. That is a good one.

princess,
I like the superfluous 'u' in the word 'favorite'. Are you Canadian?

rhiann,
the lying cuntress has many cuntroges throughout the land.

wmy,
hey, while you're down there on your knees....

Blogger yournamehere said...

nick,
I defer to the horse pussy expert.

kate,
not having a girlfriend or a sex life to speak of gives me ample free time to waste everyone's time with this blather.

kat,
I'll try not to disappoint you in the future.

pants,
are you saying this post is adorable? Speaking of adorable, that is one saucy profile pic. I may have to resume stalking you. West coast, here I come...

tracy,
you didn't like that job anyway.

afromabq,
it's a secret.

spinning girl,
you're out of cuntrol!

kendra,
yes he did. Thanks for the recap.

cincy,
thanks. I'm out of cunt words.

nick,
everyone, any complaints should be forwarded to Nick's blog.

ubie,
will his neck snap from the strain?

Blogger TubbyAZ said...

Mmmmm, cunty!

Blogger Princess Pointful said...

You spotted me from a mile away.
And I didn't even have to bust out the stereotypical "eh".

Blogger Vache Folle said...

It's the "c word" around here, except when we mean cancer.

Blogger Turnbaby said...

Ooooo I do love making up new combinations and that last one is excellent.

Found your blog in a round about way but I would have clicked on it for the title alone. I'm just up the road in Lexington.

Blogger Eve said...

Don't forget "cuntfused," which describes a guy who is, as they used to say, pussy whipped.

Blogger Eve said...

Don't forget "cuntfused," which describes a guy who is, as they used to say, pussy whipped.

Blogger BrokeMom said...

I call my exwife 'Cuntface'. Makes for good fun.

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