Saturday, August 25, 2007
I just read Nick's post about his high school reunion. It was a memorable entry because Nick had a positive experience, and Nick has a positive experience about as often as I have a sensible meal.

However, it didn't make me ever want to go to a high school reunion. I've avoided my various high school reunions the way Paris Hilton avoids not sucking cock when a camera's rolling. I have no interest in seeing anyone from high school, even the people I was friends with back in the day. We obviously weren't good friends or I'd have heard from them in the past century or so.

Do I have any perverse interest in seeing the ravages of middle-age on the various jocks and cheerleaders who made high school life so god damn interminable? Yeah, sure; but not enough to get dressed up and hang out with them in some rental room at a suburban hotel. I hate small talk and social niceties and Southern pseudo-politeness. And I'm not dancing to any god damn Phil Collins songs!

A few months ago I went to a good friend's parents' fiftieth wedding anniversary. I saw a lady I hadn't seen since I was fifteen years old, and for some reason I walked over and reintroduced myself. This girl was always very pretty and time has been very very kind to her.

The conversation didn't last very long, not because she isn't a nice person, but because I had nothing to say. Nothing. What could I say? "Hey, you're still hot. Uh, yeah, I'm still fat but I'm much taller now. Um, I still have all my hair. Bye now." Nope, not even an option.

Why do I have absolutely no interest in reunions? My mom's side of the family is having a reunion tomorrow and I really don't want to waste a day off talking to those people and eating casseroles. I'd rather be at the brewpub.

Do any of you people like forced social situations? If so, please explain why.


Blogger Nick said...

but casseroles are awesome

Blogger miss kendra said...

i don't think i'll go to my reunion either. unless they book me as a performer. :)

Blogger greensunflowerRN said...

The last forced situation I was in, was at my grandfather's funeral, where I realized why my mom moved from Oregon to California and never looked back. They are somewhere between mentally retarded and just plain white trash... my extended family that is. I had to sit through superbowl sunday after losing my favorite grandparent and listen to my uncle burp and fart during dinner and laugh hysterically while he did it, but not before my cousin hit on me. Did I mention I was there with my HUSBAND!!! And after all that my mentally ill/developmentally delayed cousin asked if she could see my boobies.

No I do not like forced social situation with my extended family. Those seem to be the only ones I am obligated for, otherwise I am just a bitch and say NO... or just dont show up.

Blogger Dr. Chingasa said...

I missed my 10 year because I was on my honeymoon. I want to go to my 20 year reunion which is fast approaching out of morbid curiosity. Plus I want to see if the hotties are still hot. Unfortunatley, my closest high-school friends have vowed an oath to God that they will never go to a class reunion.

Blogger Dale said...

I've got less than zero desire to do the high school reunion thing and have let them pass me by. I'd be in the same boat, what do I say to these people? I wouldn't mind seeing say an updated yearbook so I could have a laugh though.

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

I didn't go to either of my reunions. The only way I'm going to the next one is if I'm married to one of my many celebrity crushes.

Or at least divorced from him.

Blogger Tracy said...

I went to both my 10 and 20 year reunion. Admittedly, i graduated from a class of 62 (girls, not the year)

At year 10 - Our class "hottie" was obese and the class bitch was still a complete bitch. The class goody two shoes had a baby 7mos after prom (he was a preemie).

But i did have a good time at both events.

Blogger lily said...

the sublime combo of two things: free food and no shame.

Blogger yournamehere said...

yes they are.

I want to hire you. Will you work for pie and burritos?

you call her "developmentally delayed", I call her "boobie aficionado".

dr. c,
they should have your 20 year at the Tuna Canoe.

I once thought could be used for that, but only successful people who've aged well seem to post there.

scar bro,
just tell people you're divorced from a celebrity. Sure, they'll laugh at you behind your back like "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion", but hey, you could blog about it.

you are a twenty-four hour party person.

Blogger katrocket said...

I don't need to attend any school reunions because Facebook has done all the legwork for me. So I already possess a sense of superiority over my former classmates, and I've been spared a very long drive and a lot of awkward hugs.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

I enjoy forced social situations because they make good blog fodder.

Blogger la dolce said...

I'd rather drag my vagina over hot coals (;)) than go to a reunion!

Even though....I was the cheerleader.

Blogger Crystal said...

I just want to go to set the gym on fire. With all of them in it.

Late for my therapy appointment.

Blogger Nick said...

I would just like to add two things to this conversation:

1. I am a genius, I mean did you read my post? Wow.


2. I will work for burritos and pie. No question.

Blogger PoppyWill said...

But what kind of pie?

Blogger CAMCAM said...

I think I'm in love with Nick

Blogger Beth said...

My 30th class reunion is coming up, but my crowd isn't going. Just not anybody we're interested in running into.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

Reunions blow.

Bring on the pie and burritos.

Blogger Jeannie said...

I don't go to any school reunions for the reasons you've stated.

We are having a first family reunion next weekend and I will be there. I also love family weddings. I think it's a girl thing.

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