Sunday, December 09, 2007
No justice in the suburbs of the Natty...
Recently, far Northern Kentucky has been a real source of embarrassment for the city of Louisville. Because the Creation Museum, which teaches children that the earth is only 6,000 years old (not true) and that man lived in harmony with vegetarian dinosaurs (false), is in Kentucky, a lot of people assume my hometown has something to do with it. I assure you, it does not.

But the Creation Museum is nothing compared to the worst thing Northern Kentucky ever did to the city of Louisville. It was far worse when they let Mel Ignatow go free.

In 1988 Mel Ignatow was arrested for the murder of his girlfriend, Brenda Sue Schaefer. His lawyers managed to get a change of venue from Louisville to Kenton County, about a hundred miles away, just across the river from Cincinnati, Ohio. At the trial, the jury heard evidence of Ignatow's abuse of Schaefer; about how he decided to kill her when she tried to end their relationship. Also, Ignatow's female accomplice testified that she took pictures while he brutally raped, tortured, murdered and buried Schaefer. She wore a wire for the authorities and Ignatow is on tape telling her not to worry because "that place we dug is not shallow."

Despite this overwhelming evidence, the Kenton County clowns acquitted Ignatow of all charges. After the trial, some of the jurors said they didn't trust the witness because of her short skirt. Some even admitted to wanting to get the trial over with before the start of the Christmas holiday. When the judge read the verdict, he basically told the jury they were fucking retarded. He later took the unprecedented step of writing an apology to the Schaefer family. How moronic was this jury? Los Angeles juries thought this jury was dumb.

The entire city of Louisville was outraged by the miscarriage of justice. Imagine our anger two years later, when a guy buys Mel Ignatow's old house, rips out the old carpet, and finds pictures of Ignatow raping, torturing, murdering and burying Brenda Schaefer. Hey, isn't that just how the prosecution's "unreliable" star witness described it? Imagine that!

Although Mel Ignatow couldn't be tried a second time for murder, he did spend time in jail for committing perjury on the stand. But of course, you can't give someone a life sentence for perjury, so he's out of jail now.

Ignatow lives in Louisville, which really pisses me off. They should make him move to Kenton County; he's their problem as far as I'm concerned. In fact, his original jury should be forced to live with him in a large loft and have their lives taped for reality TV. I'd watch Living with Mel just to see those cocksuckers squirm.

Click here to read more about this travesty.


Brenda Sue Schaefer was a nurse at my Dr's office. I remember about 3months after she went missing, I got sick and my mom took me to see the Doc. My Dr. proceeded to tell us that he knew that her boyfriend had killed her, and that HE was going to kill Mel Ignatow! He said that as a Dr., he knew how to kill someone without it being traced back to him. Too bad that crazy son of bitch died himself only a month or so later, or I believe Ignatow may have gotten his.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

Exactly how long should her skirt have been to make her believable? Is there a chart available?

Blogger Nick said...

They're from Kentucky, Ubie. They also believe that an all powerful being made everything in the universe in 7 days. They're not exactly bursting with rationality.

Also, this is a very festive holiday themed story, Todd.

Blogger yournamehere said...

See, the Kenton county jury and the Creation Museum are why people like Nick feel the need to make sweeping, uninformed generalizations about the entire state of Kentucky.

Thanks for proving my point, native of a state where it's illegal to teach science.

Blogger Nick said...

I don't feel the need to make sweeping generalizations because of the idiots on that jury, your dumb museum or even your state's proud legacy of racism. I do it because i think it's funny.

Also, I hate Tubby Smith.

But feel free to take it as a personal slight.

Blogger miss kendra said...

omg. i'm going to go down there in one of my burlyQ outfits and tell them they are all absolutely correct, jesus is real and gay marriage is a crime against god.


Blogger Tits McGee said...

My head hurts now.

Blogger Lauren said...

It's a little surprising that Ignatow hasn't been killed by a vigilante yet. Personally, I hope he lives a very long and very miserable life.

I feel bad saying that only because his sister was my Sophomore English teacher, and I liked her a lot.

Wow, lot of agnostics here at the Mullet I see.

Anyway, I just saw something more tragic than both of the items listed in the post. I was flipping through the channels and saw John Edward (the so called psychic) selling a DVD set on how to communicate with the dead on HSN! The worst part was listening to the people who called in and babbled on about how they were able to communicate with their dead parent because of John's course! Why won't someone kill THIS asshole?

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

So if you firebomb his house and I show up in court to testify that I saw you do it and I wear a super short skirt then you're free and he's dead. Problem solved.

Blogger angie said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

Blogger angie said...

the justice system sucks..there are so many people who go missing or who are killed that never see justice of any kind..thats why i think so many people take things into their own are you supposed to trust the justice system when it has failed so many people?? its not only the justice system that has failed that poor girl..a jury failed her..nobody deserves to die like that..and it certainly should not have gone unpunished..

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