Friday, August 15, 2008
Friday News and Notes
"Thank God It's Friday" is bullshit in my little world, because I have to work tonight and tomorrow, but it's still a good time to pull some random thoughts out of my ass because I can't think of anything to write about at length.

"Damn kids and your music..."
I happened upon this quote from The Man Who Would Be President, John McCain: “Now we’ve got the cables. We’ve got talk radio. We’ve got the bloggers. I hate the bloggers. We’ve got all kinds of sources of information.” Oh, where to begin? "...the cables"?! Is that what he calls cable television? The fucking cables? Cable TV came to Louisville in the late 1970s, and I'm sure it was in the bigger cities before then, so it's not like some new, scary technology. It makes me wonder if McCain refers to televisions as "moving picture boxes" or cars as "horseless carriages".

The main thing that stands out in that quote, however, is "I hate the bloggers." Has John McCain ever read a blog? He's admitted to not knowing how to surf the internet. Can you hate an entire group of people who write for a medium that you can't even access?

"No, I can't go. I have to work."
Working some nights and most weekends sucks shit. It's a horrible, dehumanizing way to live, that's for sure. Looking back, it was probably a mistake to think I'd be dead by thirty.

"At least animal flesh is still tasty."
If you want to eat some animal flesh that's delicious and has less fat than chicken, try a bison burger. C'mon, don't be a pussy.

Wanted: Blog Consultants
Obviously, this blog needs a gimmick. "The guy who no longer has anything interesting to say" angle isn't working. I could pretend to move back to Vegas; people seemed to like that. All I have to do is read Las Vegas Weekly online, and write about not being able to get into Noir Bar at the Luxor because I was deemed "Not douchy enough" by some fascist doorman who suffers from "steroid sack". Or I could just lie about getting laid a lot.





17 Comments:

Blogger Sara said...

yeah I vote for getting laid a lot.

Dude, your bitterness is your gimmick. And I thank the dark gods for your bitterness.

Blogger dizzy von damn! said...

i agree with the doctor monkey.

Hey, don't you call the internet, internets?

Blogger yournamehere said...

I do that ironically.

Blogger John said...

Just Dukes of Hazard'ing a guess here, but I think McCain was talking about the cable news networks when he said "the cables." Kinda like calling the Emmy Awards the Emmies. Or, he might just be an out-of-touch idiot about such things. Won't matter soon anyway. Obama's gonna smoke him come November.

And dude, I may have weekends off, but my crappy job includes working EVERY weekday night (I don't get home til 11:30) and it's physically demanding and the summers here are like being a mile from the Sun, so I spend the weekends on my ass recuperating. Fuck, it sucks being 42. Who knew we'd make it past 30? This sucks.

Blogger Übermilf said...

In fact, I call for MORE bitterness.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

Also, more nudity.

Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

I hear ya, Todd. These days, I'd be happy with half of your 8 comments per post. You don't need an angle (aside from the ones you already have), you just need motivation.

Incidentally, every couple of weeks or so you may feel the remnants of a tremor over in Kentucky. That's from the stampede of new friends running away from me when they realize I work nights and Saturdays. Who knew that was such a repulsive quality?

Blogger country roads said...

I never really counted on living much past 30 and I'm now 34. I don't have to work weekends, though, and that's good because otherwise my couch would get lonely.

and, more nudity never hurt anyone.

Blogger John said...

and, more nudity never hurt anyone.

Except for the kids who slept over at Michael Jackson's house. D'oh!

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

I vote for more pictures of kittens.

And bunnies.

Don't forget the bunnies.

I've only been asking for 3 or 4 years, but I will try one more time; write the story about Will Bird. It's pure gold.

Blogger Übermilf said...

Was Will Bird naked and/or bitter?

Blogger Tits McGee said...

NAKED KITTENS AND BUNNIES

Blogger Nick said...

Dukes of Hazzard has 2 z's.

No, but it's the greatest true story ever. Trust me. Maybe if everyone else pressures Todd, he'll do it. He sure as hell won't listen to me!

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