I've never seen Gossip Girl and have no immediate plans to start watching it, but Blake Lively and Leighton Meester can lick the fuck out of an ice cream cone.
This cover was designed to appeal to man's basest instincts and I must say....Mission accomplished! When I see this photo I frankly couldn't care less about the hopes and dreams of these two unobtainable twentyish women. And I'm not usually like that, even when I want to be! I'm the moron who ends up talking to strippers about their personal problems, for crying out loud.
Don't worry, I never bring up my fondness for this cover in everyday life. For example, none of my recent disasterous dates fell apart because of a conversation like this:
Date, already hating me: "So I've been there almost three years. It could pay more, but I really like my job."
Me, looking at the menu: "Yeah, good for you...Hey, have you seen that fucking hot Rolling Stone cover with those Gossip Girl chicks getting ready to deep-throat an ice cream cone?"
Date, completely hating me: "Uh...no."
Me, oblivious to her contempt: "If you could get it on with either girl, who would you pick? I'm a Leighton Meester guy myself. I'll bet she's a t-i-g-e-r."
Yeah, I have enough problems without being THAT GUY.
Now, to turn attention away from my blatant sexism, I present this widely circulated picture of Obama.
That's the President in France, checking out the hind quarters of a young lady. ABC News claims if you watch the video he isn't really looking at her ass, but come on. French President Pepe LePew knows what's going on.
Just as Bill Clinton made it acceptable for liberals to be blatant womanizers, Barack Obama is giving leering a new respectability. I love the Democratic Party!
1 Comments:
"Mentally substitute?" How about an actual example?
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