Shitburger Alert!

The new G.I. Joe movie is coming out soon and the trailer looks just god awful. Also, the studio is refusing to preview the movie for critics. That usually means only one thing: It's an unwatchable pile of possum shit and the producers want to try to cash in with a big opening weekend before poor word-of-mouth buries it.

I had no desire to see this movie anyway, but be warned that it's most certainly a wretched cinematic abortion. If this movie is as crappy as advance word has it, I hope it fails miserably. I love it when a terrible film loses a lot of money. Conversely, when a dumb, lazy, by-the-numbers movie does well, it fills me with rage and sadness. Dear, sweet, stupid American public, let's stop rewarding garbage, ok?

Besides, I have it on good word that for ever dollar of profit made by G.I. Joe, a borderline angel will descend into hell. One of those iffy angels could be your grandpa. Do you want that on your conscience, grandpa-hell-sender?