Friday, October 14, 2005
For Nick: A special "viva las vegASS" edition of "Shovel Justice"
I have a "blog" I've never updated entitled "Shovel Justice"; the premise being I and readers of this blog nominate people who need to be hit in the face with a shovel. Nick, of "Sacrelicious" semi-fame (or is that quasi-obscurity?) hates Ashton Kutcher. Actually, all straight males hate Ashton; as do all gay males and most women over the age of twelve.

I only went to one site to retrieve a picture of this no-talent douchebrain and they didn't have a photo of him wearing that stupid fucking hat he got at a Stuckey's in Arkansas. I couldn't bear to subject my computer to another Ashton Kutcher fan site, so I went with this one.

You're welcome, Nick; and other haters of shit.







For my own amusement, please allow me to add an illustration of Peter Griffin beating the crap out of Jimmy Fallon.



20 Comments:

Ashton is a douche. Same with anyone who wears one of those fucking trucker hats in a desperate attempt to look like him.

Dear Ashton,

Please die, kthx.

-Shannon

Blogger Übermilf said...

Dude, Where's My Talent?

Blogger Nick said...

As a lover and student of vocabulary, I feel that there are no words to describe the seething hatred, the bowel-curdling animus I feel towards Ashton "shitfucker-ing douchebag" Kutcher. Therefore, I charge the wonderful, like-minded individuals who frequent Todd's domain to create one for me. You must assist me in verbally subjugating Asthon "Satan's Dick Sock" Kutcher. It is your duty as human beings!

Blogger yournamehere said...

Let's see, names for Kutcher:

smegma-pouch

mangina

I'm very tired. I'll think of more tomorrow.

Blogger mona said...

Nick: just say Ashton. thats enough....we all understand.

Blogger Übermilf said...

Well, I was saving this for later, but if you want to use it now to curse Ashton, you may.

Blogger MollyNormal said...

I love your new banner, Todd!!! Some wonderful, caring, sleep-deprived person must have made that for you. :p

Blogger Nick said...

Ubie, that's hilarious. You know what is unfortunate, I was tentative about clicking the link because I've been burned by your links so many times. You're like the boy (who is a girl) who cried (typed) wolf (granny wearing ass-dividing pants)

my word: autisticunt

Blogger MsHellion said...

ASSton Kutcher

Blogger Übermilf said...

Nick, you're a wuss. Oooh, I might see a yucky picture! I'm scared of mean old Ubermilf and the way her photos make me feel inside!

Grow a pair and quit sniveling, you wanker.

Blogger Nick said...

Why is so hard for you to take a compliment?

Blogger Brookelina said...

Ashton does nothing for me either way. He's a nonentity.

Blogger yournamehere said...

I actually hate Jimmy Fallon more than ASSton, maybe because when Kutcher hosted SNL he could actually refrain from laughing at himself and constantly mugging for the camera.

Blogger Ruben said...

Can I be the forst one to bash his face in with the shovel?

Blogger Nick said...

No way, Rue, I totally called dibs.

Blogger katarina said...

I never realized how crooked his nose is. Maybe because I don't go out of my way to look at him.
I used to like him until he started hanging out with P Diddy. Like I ever believed that they were friends. Just like I don't believe he married OLD what's-her-name.

Blogger Brookelina said...

I would rather shovel Andy Dick. Or David Spade. I call dibs on both of them. Not only untalented, but unattractive as well.

Blogger Nick said...

Demi Moore may be old but she still has an amazing rack. It's the only reason I can think of that he would marry her. Unless she can make diamonds out of coal in her nether-regions.

Blogger katarina said...

They're fake. Anybody can have that rack for a price.

Blogger Nick said...

What's your point?

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