Thursday, March 09, 2006
Life Isn't Fair, Part One

Why do guys want to become rock stars?

Because Motley Crue's Mick Mars gets pussy. Lots of pussy.


34 Comments:

Blogger Egan said...

Really? How do you know that ugly dude gets mass pussy? He looks like an odd version of Cher.

Blogger AMS said...

aaaaaaahhhhh he fuckin scares me!!

Blogger tlsd said...

Todds... that picture actually crashed my PC...

*shudder*

EW - seeing him and Cher togther... would make you want to dig your eye's out with a spoon...

Blogger Blonde said...

I wouldn't fuck him even on my worst Vegas-alcohpol induced haze.

Just looking at him makes my pussy vaporlock itself shut...

Blogger katarina said...

I wouldn't worry too much about him. He'll be dead soon.

Blogger Mushy said...

I thought he was dead! It looks like the only thing left running through his veins is H. And there certainly was never any action behind his eyes anyway, so there's nothing going on in his skull.

Blogger Kris said...

Please not before breakfast.

Blogger Secret said...

Who's pussy? EEEWWWW!!! I never want to meet those girls!

Blogger yournamehere said...

egan,
I've read a book about the Crue. I hated their "music" but that book was disturbingly entertaining.

ams,
of course he does; you're a good person.

tlsd,
is he "dating" Cher, or do you just hate her in general?

blonde,
of course you wouldn't fuck him. You have self-esteem, unlike a Motley Crue groupie.
Speaking of Vegas, don't be offended if I try to open the vaporlock.

kat,
maybe he'll live forever, like Keith Richards.

mushy,
I wonder if he has the memories of all of those groupies or if his smack-addled brain is completely void.

kris,
Mick says he'll wait all day for you if he has to.

teri,
I saw Mick Mars at an O'Charley's restaurant in Louisville back in '94. Here is the conversation I had with a co-worker friend of mine:
me:"Ugh, I think Mick Mars from Motley Crue is sitting at that table over there?"
she:"What is Mick Mars doing at an O'Charley's in Louisville?"
me:"Well, Motley Crue is playing in town tomorrow night, and the ugliest man on earth is dressed like a gypsy and is dining with two hot women. Who else could it be?"
she:"Yeah, that's Mick Mars, all right."
Those women were gorgeous, but I still didn't want to meet them.

I've never really understood the whole "date an ugly rock star." Or even "fuck an ugly rock star." I hope beyond hope that he has a sweet disposition, a big dick, and a heart of gold.

Blogger afromabq said...

do you think it's the eyes???

Blogger Claudia said...

I'm scared.

That picture kinda reminds me of E.T.

Blogger Cheska said...

Doesn't he have some strange spinal degenerative disease that has left him permanently bent over and barely able to walk? And he still gets all that pussy? Fuck me, life really isn't fair...

Blogger tlsd said...

... egan said "He looks like an odd version of Cher"... I immediately imagined them together... it was wrong... very very wrong

Todds... I promise you - you'd get lots of pussy in the UK... well maybe just mine... but I'm sure I could make that satisfying enough...

Blogger Egan said...

tlsd - was the Cher thing a stretch? It's tough to tell, but that's who popped in my mind at first glimpse.

Todd - you read books? I should do the same, but blogs have a grip on me right now. Damn blogs.

Blogger miss kendra said...

is he dead?

Blogger tlsd said...

egan... I guess it's not that much of a stretch... see what the power of your suggestion made me think of though:

Mick n Cher.

Blogger Egan said...

tlsd - damn that photo you created is terrifying. I had to close it while here at work. Thanks for sharing though and I mean that.

Blogger Trix said...

He would never, NEVER, get mine. I don't fuck the dead.

Blogger The real me said...

The DIRT the DIRT!!

Scary thought.

Blogger yournamehere said...

Andi,
I think his disposition and heart have been filled with Jack Daniel's.

afromabq,
no, I don't. I think it's the "rock star".

claudia,
Mick does enjoy Reece's Pieces.

cheska,
maybe he doesn't get any anymore, but he got enough back in the day to last several lifetimes.

tlsd,
hey, I'm a "one pussy" kind of guy.

egan,
I read mostly non-fiction and books that bash President Bush.

kendra,
only inside.

tlsd,
that photo is hilarious. I cracked up.

egan,
be careful or you'll lose your job.

trix,
yeah, I don't see you as the "Backstage Betty" type.

real,
scary as hell.

Blogger Nick said...

What does "open the vaporlock" mean?

Blogger Cincysundevil said...

He's living proof you can do any drug in excess and live ... somehow

Blogger Tumbleweed said...

He couldn't have mine!! I miss you!

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

I think mine would rip itself from my body and run down the street screaming if that guy even came near me.

Blogger Cherry! said...

I'd rather swallow razor blades than have that 'thing' anywhere near my nether region.

I'm about to go to bed and think I may just have nightmares....

Blogger Todd said...

He looks like he could breathe underwater.

Blogger MoDigli said...

That guy is VERY SCARY! I would cringe if he came within 50 feet of my pussy!

Blogger yournamehere said...

Nick,
oh, it's just my sad, pathetic attempt at internet flirtation. Is it any wonder I'm alone?

cincy,
if I tried one hard drug, it would kill me instantly. This I know to be true.

tumbleweed,
I miss you, too.

ubie,
make sure it wears the proper footwear.

cherry,
sorry about the nightmares. Take some Nyquil and at least you won't remember them.

todd,
he has gills, no doubt.

mo,
I like when my blog makes women say "pussy".

Blogger Princess LadyBug said...

Um, ewwwwwwwwww!

I wouldn't want to be in the same elevator with that guy let alone in the same bed.

I feel icky just thinking about it. I'm going to go shower now.

Ewwwwwwwwwww!

Blogger Brookelina said...

Not for all the money in the world....

Did he always look like this or did he recently find the one ring of power?

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are a bunch of chav, pop pussy lickin asse holes. Mick Mars has more talent, personality and dignity than any of you ass holes who disrespect him without even knowing him. Did you know that not only is he a great musician but that throughout his career with Motley he has carried the burden of a debillitating spinal disease that would have killed himm long ago had he not had the character and balls to fight it.

It sickens me to read so many comments that feed of a frenzy and persecute another human being. You may hate heavy metal, Motley Crue and their like but for every one of you there is at least a hundred or more who love the genre of music and have a deep respect and love of the music and the bands that produce it. I bet if you hit hard times Mick would hold out his hand to you. Not many did when he hit hard times. Before you ask!! I am a university degree educated guy who also happens to be a European IT manager for a global chemicals company. Tell me I dont know shit!!!

Hats of to Mick and the boys and long may you reign.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

You are a bunch of chav, pop pussy lickin asse holes. Mick Mars has more talent, personality and dignity than any of you ass holes who disrespect him without even knowing him. Did you know that not only is he a great musician but that throughout his career with Motley he has carried the burden of a debillitating spinal disease that would have killed himm long ago had he not had the character and balls to fight it.

It sickens me to read so many comments that feed of a frenzy and persecute another human being. You may hate heavy metal, Motley Crue and their like but for every one of you there is at least a hundred or more who love the genre of music and have a deep respect and love of the music and the bands that produce it. I bet if you hit hard times Mick would hold out his hand to you. Not many did when he hit hard times. Before you ask!! I am a university degree educated guy who also happens to be a European IT manager for a global chemicals company. Tell me I dont know shit!!!

Hats of to Mick and the boys and long may you reign.

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