Sunday, September 17, 2006
Don't be a punk-ass fuckface if you can't back it up

This Saturday, the University of Miami Hurricanes took time out from their busy schedule of robbing convenience stores and raping coeds to come up to Louisville and play the hometown Cardinals in a game of college football. The Hurricanes began the pre-game introductions by gathering at midfield and collectively stomping on our logo. After the game, they quietly walked back to the visitor's locker room, having been ABSOLUTELY HUMILIATED BY LOUISVILLE, 31-7.

In the past few years, a few other teams thought it was a good idea to congregate at midfield before the game and stomp on the University of Louisville logo. None of these teams have left with a victory. In fact, the combined score of these games is 257-35. Not one of these arrogant groups of assholes has even managed to play a competitive game.

So please, stop coming into Cardinal Stadium and jumping up and down on the logo if you're going to play the football game like a gaggle of stumblecunts. Apparently, the home team isn't intimidated by such tactics. Also, after you are humbled like the bitches you are, you will be repeatedly taunted on Sportscenter. They will play footage of your team's empty pre-game bravado, then they'll show University of Louisville players scoring touchdowns again and again and again.

I'm not saying Louisville is unbeatable; far from it. They've had trouble on the road in the past. But unless you're Ohio State or USC, show them a little respect when you visit their house.



22 Comments:

Loved that game! I remember Louisville football games when we went there were jokes. Just reasons to socialize and drink expensive warm beer. Nice to see the ol' alma mater becoming a 2-sport power. Can't wait for the West Virginia game. Hope Brohm's back by then.

That's f'ing hilarious! You would have thought they would have learned a lesson from Cincy. They did the same crap and proceeded to get the living piss stomped out of them. I love the repeated post game humiliation provided by sportscenter!

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

This is just a musing, not based on anything but conjecture, but... if I were a college football player, I would be much MORE intimidated if the opposing team came gliding in smoothly and professionally and acting like grown-ups. Big, well-trained, efficient, muscled grown-ups exuding confidence and professionalism.

Instead you see a bunch of spoiled frat boys who are probably hung over and exhausted from raping Louisville women in place of their own, and get fired up instead.

I hate Miami.

Blogger Steph said...

Pfft! Men!
You don't see women behaving like that before playing sports now do ya??
Well??
*runs away*

Blogger Brookelina said...

They should come to my blog to learn some manners. Apparently that's where people come when they want to find out "How to behave in someone's house."

Blogger Rantin' Ron said...

I was soooo damned happy to see the Cardinals kick the shit out of the "U". God I hate those fuckers!!

Good job.

Blogger yournamehere said...

john,
Yeah, the games at old concrete graveyard stadium were strange. Remember "Every fan wins a car" day? They gave away literally dozens of cars that day.

vast,
I know someone who went to the game, and as soon as the outcome was decided, they played the tape of Miami stomping on the logo over and over on the Jumbotron. They were taunted by the scoreboard operator!

ubie,
I'm not a Southern Cal fan, but they won two straight national championships and played for a third, and they've never stomped on another team's logo.

steph,
google "Tanya Harding".

brooke,
they came for the manners, they stayed for the laughter.

ron,
it's one thing to be obnoxious when you're a dominant team; but to act like that when you obviously stink?

Blogger Holly's Boyfriend said...

... gaggle of stumblecunts ...

don't think I don't appreciate the time and thought that went into this little string of words.

Good work.

I'm not even a Louisville fan and I love that that happened. I wish I could have seen it in person. I remember a baseball game in college where there was a punk on other team that was blatantly and viciously taunting us. My coach put me in specifically to throw a 90 mph fastball into that bastards' spine. I have to admit that I found it quite gratifying. Whether it's public humiliation or receiving a crippling bean ball to the coccyx, lessons are always learned....the hard way.

Blogger Cherry! said...

I'm not really qualified to comment on this since I think I've seen like one american football game in my life....

Blogger Flounder said...

There is no greater feeling than slapping Miami down.

Go Seminoles!

BTW - Do you remember the "Camden Connection", Milt Wagner and Billy Thompson, at Louisville in the '80's? Those guys used to beat my HS basketball team for the state champs every year, so that is why I can't stand the Cards.

Blogger katarina said...

I should think you'd want them to do it since they all lose when they do.
Come to think of it, maybe I could've stomped on the logo once. That would explain why I'm such a loser...

Blogger sonrisa morena said...

yeah!! whatever todd just said!!! you keep on telling them todd!!!

Blogger Flounder said...

BTW - I still have my MUCK FIAMI shirt!

Blogger anathema said...

Miami can't really have the same attitude they've had in the past. They can't compete anymore. Throw the national championship that Larry Coker won and they've lost all swagger. It's not like the old days with Michael Irvin and Vinny Testaverde where they could simply out 'athlete' everyone. Parody has killed them.

So what do you think about Brohm being out?

Blogger yournamehere said...

holly's b-friend,
thanks. It perfectly describes the ineptitude of the Miami football team.

vast,
you just wanted to type the word "coccyx".

cherry,
angelic cuties love American football. You should give it a chance.

flounder,
Milt Wagner and Billy Thompson were in town recently for a reunion of the '86 National Championship team.
Still hate the Cards? Let it go, man.

kat,
the coach joked that he was going to buy a replica to take on the road and hope the home team would stomp on it. They haven't been so great on the road the last two years.
The way my life is going, I must have shat upon the logo in a past incarnation.

sonrisa,
thanks for commenting even though you have no interest in this post. It bodes well for our future together as husband and wife.

flounder,
nice.

anathema,
Miami is definitely living in the past.
If they lose one of the next three games, it will be because they underestimated their opponent, not because of Brohm. However, I think they need him healthy to have a chance to beat West Virginia.

Blogger Rachel said...

LMAO, that is hilarious. Glad to hear they kicked a little ass!

Blogger The Lone Rangers said...

That was a great game but hated how the announcers talked smack about Louisville before the game even started

Blogger MoDigli said...

Don't be a punk-ass fuckface if you can't back it up

I soooo wish I could use that as my "signature quote" on my work emails. That would be so awesome.

Blogger n.v. said...

Screw the Italians?

Blogger n.v. said...

Screw the Italians?

Blogger yournamehere said...

rachel,
thanks for the support, babe.

lone,
Lee Corso said our roster was filled with Miami rejects, and he was Louisville's head coach in the seventies. He left to take the job at Indiana. No one on earth would do that now.

mo,
that should be this country's motto; and we should apply it to our government.

dena,
no. That's a University of Miami "U". They call themselves "The U" for whatever reason. Some of the players, however, may in fact be Italian.

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