Monday, October 30, 2006
How was your Halloween weekend?
I dressed as a Las Vegas tourist on Friday night, complete with Hawaiian shirt, socks with sandals, and a water bottle worn as a necklace. My brother will be happy to know I even dusted off the infamous "Todd" hat for the occasion. The "Todd" hat is either the best or the worst hat ever, depending on your perspective and/or level of drunkenness.

A few other observations as I wandered about the town this weekend:

-A lot of women decided to dress up as "slut" this year. "Slut" was a popular outfit with the ladies. The awe-inspiring amount of low-cut tops combined with the cool autumn temperatures meant a pervert's ransom of diamond-cutting hard nips. Hey, it's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.

-Favorite costumes with guys were "fratty douchebag", "redneck", and "jaded hipster", depending on which particular bar we were patronizing.

-I was gang-attacked when I stated my opinion that Guns N Roses was a pile of shit band. Axl Rose sounded like Beavis when he screamed. I stand by my statements.

-I'm sticking with my opposition to a smoking ban in bars, even though I always smell like Joan of Arc's puss at the end of the night.

-My friend Erin had her birthday party Saturday night. If she didn't read this blog I'd tell you all that her sister is hot. Oh, uh...disregard that last comment. I meant "nice". Her sister is nice.

-I hate setting the clocks back an hour. Now it gets dark at five-thirty. Yippie.


29 Comments:

Blogger Steph said...

We put our clocks forward down here and i'm still hungover from it.
I swear it takes me about a week to get used to it.

Slut costumes are always popular. I think all chicks secretly, wanna be sluts. *runs away*

Blogger Brookelina said...

For Halloween I'm going to dress up as a bitchy teacher. Lucky me, I have a costume already!

Blogger EEK! said...

I'm sure my sister agrees with me re: GnR.

Good to know mine was a popular costume this year. I actually went as a vampire/whore. All depending on whether or not I was wearing my teeth at the moment.

Blogger Dawn said...

I saw a recent picture of Axl Rose in the newspaper and he face looks strange. The Botox was way overdone. Have you seen his Bo Derek in the movie "10" braided hair? Happy Halloween.

And, I'm still laughing about the water bottle necklace. Classic.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

Pictures, please.

Of you or the sluts. Preferably both together, but either would be lovely.

Blogger Nick said...

Second.

About the sluts, anyway. I could really give a fuck about pictures of you.

Glad you wore you're hat bud. That hat was the greatest birthday gift ever! You have to post a picture of it. Glad you got to see a ton of sluts with hard nips. Keep up the good work bro.

Blogger Flounder said...

My wife bought my 7-month old son a monkey costume and she expects me to dress up like an organ grinder.

Organ grinder. How painful does that sound?

Blogger katarina said...

Mmm, Todd has a crush. I'm jealous.
Love the costume idea. Need to see that hat.

Flounder, great idea. Still laughing...

Blogger aughra said...

I hate setting the clocks back, too.

My first year in college I dressed as the only good sorority chick - a dead one. I wore preppy clothes, with a t shirt from some sorority, and had a bullet hole between the eyes. Nice, eh?

Blogger Liv said...

There isnt anything wrong with going as a slut. I thought you'd be all for girls doing that Todd!!

Blogger yournamehere said...

steph,
don't run away, especially if you want to be a slut.

brooke,
what a coincidence.

erin,
I could always PRETEND to like them.

andi,
"Oh, yeah..wear the teeth."

dawn,
he is now The Has-Been Formerly Known as Axl Rose.

tits,
I don't have any pictures. I usually avoid cameras.

nick,
it didn't occur to me to walk down the street taking pictures. This was stupid of me, because it would have been a great excuse to take pictures of big-busted gals because "I really like your costume."

vast,
when I first received the Hat I was shocked and dismayed. But I still have it, so it has staying power.

flounder,
fake having the stomach flu.

kat,
no, I don't have a crush; just a spillover of my unbridled lust.

aughra,
I love that costume idea. Did you go to a frat party wearing it? That would have been funny.

livi,
you misunderstand. I was just saying there were a lot of sluts, not that I had any problem with them. I don't like the sickening trend of twelve-year-olds dressing as sluts, but these girls were all over twenty-one and have my endorsement.

Blogger sonrisa morena said...

i hate the whole hour changing as well!!

AND will you be posting pictures?

Blogger Nick said...

you should print up a bunch of stickers that say "Endoresed By Todd" and just go around slapping them on people's asses.

Blogger Rachel said...

HA! I was rocking the Hugh Heffner costume this year but I had to borrow the Playboy.

Do we get to see pictures?


Lovin' you!


P.S. Can I have one of the stickers?

Blogger miss kendra said...

i went to some crap party wherein every girl was dressed as a variation on the slut theme... and then me, dressed as poison ivy.

it ruled.

Blogger Blonde said...

I was a slut by default because my sister had to shop for my costume...fucking Tinkerbell.

What is the TODD hat? you didn't go into detail....

Oh, and be a little more specific and/or graphic and tell us what St. Joan of Arc's cunt smells like....

Blogger Shelly said...

Ah yes, but the alarm clock goes off an hour later.....

And therein lies bliss.

Blogger Burr-ee-toe said...

I had to go with the token slutty Catholic school girl costume because I tried to go to Costume Castle and I'm terrified of crowds, so I left after being in there for about 10 seconds. So really, we can blame my lack of creativity on Costume Castle.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have pictures of the Toddles in all his Halloween glory.

Blogger Dawn said...

Tee-hee.... I wonder if he will end up as a Vegas Act wearing a water bottle necklace onstage...... hmmmm.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

Stop asking for a sucker! You're not getting one!

Blogger Egan said...

Stop asking for a hummer! You're not getting one!

Blogger yournamehere said...

sonrisa,
no, I won't be posting.

nick,
I knew this bartender who gave me stickers with the bar's logo on them and told me to "distribute" them. I (with their permission, of course) but a lot of stickers on a lot of asses that night.

rachel,
you should have been the Playmate.

kendra,
Are you talking about the character Poison Ivy or the plant that makes you itchy? Either way, I'm sure you looked great.

blonde,
I'd like to see you in that Tinkerbell costume; and out of that Tinkerbell costume.

shelly,
one hour of sleep doesn't make up for all of that premature darkness.

burr,
I wholeheartedly endorse your slutty attire.

erin,
I'll PAY you to never show those to anyone.

dawn,
Axl Rose has Vegas Headliner written all over him.

ubie,
are you okay?

egan,
who are you telling?

Blogger Sysm said...

GnR sucked.

Okay, "Welcome to the Jungle" was okay. But they jumped the shark during the first fucking CD. "Paradise City?" Jesus.

And don't make me talk about "Sweet Child o' Mine."

Blogger sonrisa morena said...

damn!!what if i post a picture of me in the french maid costume

Blogger Housekeeper said...

You forgot the bucket of nickles.

Blogger Lushy said...

I admittedly dressed up as a slut this year, but I wore a fully lined bra for extra eye protection for the fellows. I'm all about eye safety.

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