Friday, November 17, 2006
The Playstation 3 Disciples

This isn't the Holy Grail, although you would think so based on the attention it has received lately.

For those of you with jobs and/or a family, it's the Playstation 3. Dude, it's like the Playstation 2 only totally better.

On the way to work Thursday morning I stopped at the nearest Starbucks, which happens to be located inside a Target (They're building a Starbucks in the back seat of my car, but it won't have it's grand opening until the first of the year). I saw a bunch of young unemployable layabouts sitting outside of the main entrance, in the rain.

"Hmm," I thought to myself, "Target must be the exclusive vendor for Phish reunion tickets."

NO....according to the incredulous Starbucks employee, these jobless warts on the scrote of society were waiting until the Playstation 3 went on sale at 8am EST the next day.

Damn, it must be nice to not have a job (or have a job that lets you take a week off for nothing) and still be able to afford a six hundred dollar toy.

I thought about "accidentally" driving my car into their line, but I saw Scared Straight when I was a kid, so no way I'm going to prison. If I had the money, I would have just walked to the front of the line at 7:59 Friday morning. What would they have done? Their mystical powers are useless in the real world.


I read on Yahoo that some punks in Lexington did drive by BB shootings at those losers waiting in line. No one was hurt, so it is freakin' hilarious.

What do you think the chances of one of these morons ever getting laid is? I say zero. Too bad they aren't in line to be summarily executed......

Blogger Brookelina said...

I weep for America.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's tragic that not only will they not get laid but the eventual carpal tunnel will also preclude the jerking off.

It's a sad life, really.

Blogger Rachel said...

Tis a sad day indeed when O.J. is making millions on his "hypothetical" killing of two people and others have nothing better to do then stand in line to spend $600 on a game system.

I bet they saved 6 months of their hard-earned Burger King money to pay for that thing.

Blogger katarina said...

They were camped out for DAYS around here. We had horrible storms with tornados, but it didn't stop the useless minds of America. No wonder other countries hate us.

Blogger s@bd said...

apparently you can re-sell those puppies on ebay for upwards of $2000 ...

makes you kind of wish you were out in the rain, too, doesn't it?

Blogger MoDigli said...

This is a sign of our total stupidity. That's all I gotta say about it!

Oh, excpet that I heard there was a REAL robbery, shooting outside of a walmart. I heard it on the radio - NPR - but forget the town or state it happened. People were lined up pre-opening hours and some guys came by with a pistol and a sawwed off shotgun to rob them. One person got shot in the deal. I wasn't surprised, though. WalMart is so effin cheap - they don't have security in the parking lots and are known nationally as having outrageous rates of violent crimes happening in their parking lots. Rapes, murders, shootings ... seriously.

Blogger Tits McGee said...


Katarina??? That was one of the dumbest statements I have ever heard. Do you really agree with other countries hating us over that?? The freedom to do what you want even if it is stand in shitty weather to buy a game?

Blogger Dawn said...

Go to Ebay and type in PlayStation 3. Some of the bids are in the $2,000.00 range.

The people camped out since Tuesday here in the O.C. waiting for their chance to buy this thing, were featured in the newspaper today.

Blogger miss kendra said...

hehehe. what WOULD they have done???

woah i just read some of the other comments.

i better go now.

Blogger Egan said...

Miss Kendra, can you hold my place in line?

Blogger yournamehere said...

line 'em up, shoot 'em down.

I'll get you a hanky.

oh, they'll find a way to jerk off.

I might have to get a second job at Burger King, so I'm not throwing stones.

too bad a tornado didn't deposit them in another country.

it makes me realize there are people dumb enough to pay two grand for this thing.

Wal-Mart parking lots are war zones.

well said.

relax, my man. We're all friends here at the Mullet.

they're probably auditioning for a movie about stupid people.

wait, don't go...
They would have called their parents.

she has a cold. Don't make her brave the elements.

Blogger Melissa said...

Have I told you lately that you are a shining star for expanding my vocabulary the way you do?
There was a camp of the scrotal warts you referred to outside Wal-Mart the other night when I went grocery shopping. They looked like they MIGHT be homeless, so I tossed my change at them. They think I'm an asshole. I'm OK with that.

Blogger Monkey said...

jobless warts on the scrote of society

Is there no end to your genius?

Blogger aughra said...

hee. Phish reunion tickets.

I love you.

Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

My sister and I were once accosted in a Wal-Mart parking lot by a crackhead woman trying to get us in her husband's windowless van. This despite the fact that it was 5:30 p.m. And that I was 23 years old at the time.

At my local Target, people were camped out two days before the PS3 release. I hope the local fishwrap took their pictures and printed their names for their employers' and teachers' sake.

It's a corrupt system anyway. My friend stood in line when they were issuing numbered tickets, got a high number, and then returned two days later. He got his system.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Read this, I implore you.

Blogger Steph said...

The freaks in line, and the freaks rioting and shooting each other, made headline news down here.

I was feeling all smug and superior thinking that shit would never happen in OZ, when my 17 Year old cousin said; "Fucking hell, I better pack my pistol and get the sleeping bag ready".

Oh noes!

This whole mess, from the drive-by Playstation shooting to the huddle outside Tarjay for a Nintendo needs to be made into a tragic Greek play, chorus and all.

While I am no stranger to useless toys and consumerism...I routinely see children with REAL COACH BAGS around here. I don't mean teenagers...I mean 8 year old girls that are walking around with non-faux, genuine designer purses that I had to wait until I was hurtling towards 30 to buy. To say nothing of all the women I see on the train who have a different designer purse every day of the week.

Where do these people find the money? Do they save ANYTHING at all? I have a pretty nice job but to make ends meet I have to live in a hovel, drive an econobox and eat out of trashcans. Okay, I take that last one back. Still, it boggles my mind that these bitches aren't drowning in credit card debt. I'm beginning to wonder if a solid part of the L.A. metro riding populace is involved in either dealing or prostitution.

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