Wednesday, March 26, 2008

I was thinking today that having to drive to work is kind of like being forced to dig your own grave; or having to carve your own coffin out of a single piece of wood.

Really, I have to sit in traffic to get to someplace that sucks? Fuck that.

In these dark times, I turn to the winged horse Pegasus. My people are working on a deal in which I can ride Pegasus to and from work every day. I plan on feeding him lots of chili so he'll shit all over the poor fuckers stuck in gridlock on Hurstbourne Lane.

Am I losing my mind? Clearly.


Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

You know what I was thinking? You should consider getting a different job.

Blogger E Flo said...

I think work sucks. Always.

Blogger John said...

Oh sweet Beelzebub, you just gave me nightmarish flashbacks to that constant cluster fuck called Hurstbourne Lane traffic. Can't you transfer to another store. If not, can't you carry extra clips and kill everyone in your way? THERE HAS TO BE A SOLUTION!!!

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

I think you are the sanest one around.

Blogger ginonymous said...

i have to drive by the country club and an exclusive private prep school to get to work in the morning, and i RELISH my drive to work.

my car is fully insured and completely paid off. I can afford to take a few swings at these privileged fuckers every morning and it feels good! MOVE THAT PORSCHE, ASSHAT!!

gotta get your joy where you can.

It's the only thing to do when you see a 16 year-old driving a car that's worth more than your house.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

I walk to work.

And I like my job.

Please don't hate me.

Blogger Steph said...

Cool idea although yeah, you clearly are going a bit nuts......Moreso than usual.
What Scarlet hip said. Get a better job!!!

Blogger Ambitious Blonde said...

I've always wanted a trained monkey to fling poop at the idiots I encounter, but a pegasus? Dewd, you're cooler than I gave you credit for. :)

Blogger jazzbonejoe said...

And also gayer.

Blogger Windrider said...

I actually love the idea.. Not crazy at all.

My fantasies are a bit more sinister.

Nothing quite sucks like having to work for the Man.

Blogger Dale said...

Make sure you park carefully or someone might steal your ride leaving you with only your 'My Little Pony' to get to work on.

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