Thursday, December 11, 2008
Separated at Birth?

Disgraced Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich

University of Louisville Athletic Director Tom Jurich

Now I know why Jurich won't fire the shitty football coach: He's waiting for a decent bribe!

I sent a member of the highly respected Death Wore a Feathered Mullet news team to call Mr. Jurich and ask about the head coaching job. Of course, we taped the conversation. Here are a few highlights.

Our operative asked about the possibility of hiring a new coach, and Jurich said "This coaching position is a fucking valuable thing, you just don’t give it away for nothing. I’ve got this thing and it’s fucking golden, and, uh, uh, I’m just not giving it up for fucking nothing. I’m not gonna do it. And, and I can always use it. I can parachute me there and coach that fucking team."

When pressed for details about fan pressure to make a coaching change, Jurich stated "The fans aren't willing to give me anything except appreciation. Fuck them."

This will not stand, man! I don't give half a turd about corruption in Chicago, but when the integrity of a third-rate football program is called into question, it's time for action.


There is a resemblance to Jurich, but think hard about who that mofo look EXACTLY like......NAMBLA Dan Bradford. It's his fucking identical twin.

Blogger Übermilf said...

He also looks like a ventriloquist dummy.

I am afraid to look up the NAMBLA guy to make a comparison. I'll take VRWC's word for it.

Blogger yournamehere said...

Okay, a bit of a back story is in order. Years ago I decided that the worst wrestling villain in the history of the "sport" would be a guy named NAMBLA Dan. I just randomly chose the name Dan. His gimmick would have been entering the ring escorted by two eight-year-old boys, where he would presumably be attacked and killed by outraged Southerners.

My brother found this scenario amusing, and it so happened that one of the first guys he met in Vegas was his realtor, a guy named Dan, so my brother started calling him NAMBLA Dan. And except for the haircut, the governor does resemble NAMBLA Dan.

Blogger Tracy said...

Never trust a man with helmet hair and no top lip.

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

I'm sure his helmet head will be a big hit with the other prisoners.

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