Sunday, September 11, 2005
Goth is the New Preppie?
The other day I was leaving work just as nearby Silverado High School was letting out. Silverado is your typical suburban, middle-to-upper-middle-class school on the non-existent Henderson/Las Vegas border, so I was a little surprised at what the kids were wearing. At first I noticed a group of five or six dressed like it was Casual Friday at the morgue; they were head-to-toe in black with dyed hair and pale skin, the typical Goth uniform. When I got to my car I saw a much larger throng streaming beyond the school's grounds. They were all Goth. Every single one of them looked like the result of a bizarre gene-splicing experiment involving Michael Jackson and the remains of Bela Legosi.

This is what happens when the local mall finally gets a Hot Topics; rich, spoiled suburban douches-in-training decide to play dress up. "Oh, dark lord of the nether-world, your mom is here to pick you up in the Lexus SUV of Despair." Really, when did Goth go so mainstream? Kids used to dress Goth as a way to distinguish themselves from the crowd; now they are the crowd, at least at Silverado High. It probably isn't the same at less affluent schools. The kids who actually have the right to be sad, miserable bastards never want to dress the part.


Blogger Nettie B said...

I talked to my son about this a day ago and again this morning. He says he and his friends call the "goth wannabes" the "Sunshine Crowd". LOL. He also told me the latest "trend" are something called "The Scene Kids". What they are - are a group of kids who are a cross between a Metrosexual and a Metal Head. They sport tight trendy jeans with dyed black hair (usually devil-locked or covering one eye) wear metal-head band shirts that are short and tight (like unearth, as I lay dying, shadows fall..etc), usually sport a key ring on their jeans and usually wear pink eyeshadow around their eyes (to look sickly). They are what happens when an Abercrombie and Fitch kid meets Metallica or Slayer.. LOL.

Blogger Crystal said...

Tormented youth--I guess it's cool to be "uncool" these days, the cheerleaders & jocks have been overthrown! I'm pretty out of touch with the teens of today, being a decade removed from High School, but teen movies like "Mean Girls" do amuse me.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

Nobody realizes how useless rich people and their offspring are unless you are forced to live with them.

There is nothing worse than driving on the same streets as an aging woman with PGS (Pretty Girl Syndrome) in a Lexus SUV. I think they favor the high-end SUV because "people are beneath me" becomes literal instead of figurative for them.

It's all Amy Lee's fault (Evanescence), but she's my lesbian gf, so I can't say anything derogatory.

Blogger Kris said...

Indeed; I knew goth had made its way into the mainstream when I saw the girls purchasing their black death makeup at Sephora . . .

Blogger Brookelina said...

Soon alligator shirts will be worn to show rebellion. Preppies will be the underground warlords. Penny loafers and khakis a sign of misspent youth. Pearl earrings a symbol of sluttiness.

"Muffy, get back inside and do your homework at once! You too Baxter! And nobody is using the minivan this weekend until your rooms are clean!"

Blogger yournamehere said...

These kids could have been "Scene Kids". They were far away; all I saw was black clothing and pale skin, so they could have been wearing metal band shirts.

I knew a few eighteen and nineteen year old cashiers when I was a retail manager, but now I'm completely removed from that culture. As I should be.

I rent a house in a high-cost housing neighborhood. I know those people. They are empty.

I blame Amy Lee for forcing her talentless boyfriend down our throats. Next time duet with someone who can sing, Amy.

I want Hot Topics, the mall Goth headquarters, to sell a shirt that reads "My Soul Became One With the Prince of Darkness and All I Got Was this Lousy T-Shirt".

Ha! "The Devil Wore Bass Weejuns".

Blogger mastershake said...

haha and just imagine what they think looking back in their yearbooks at the high school reunion

Blogger AMS said...

its hillarious to torment these kids because they take themselves to seriously. there's a place in Dublin where they regularly hang out so i usually throw the "kurt cobain lives on" vibe at them to piss them off. They usually hang around drinking tonic wine and cider and thought me and my friends were the police because our clothes looked too new.

we promptly confiscated all their drink and ciggies.

Blogger WhiteBoyBob said...

Man, you speak of something that I have blogged about in the past. All these kids dressed up to rebel, except they wouldn't know how to rebel if someone slapped them in the face with it. It's just another uniform of conformity, packaged and marketed by the corporate world.

Blogger katarina said...

I haven't seen this in my area yet. But, then again, Amish is the new preppy in PA.

Blogger MollyNormal said...

All this goth shit ties directly into my obsession with guys who wear black eyeliner. I want them alllllllllllll

Blogger Kristine said...


Blogger Princess Steph said...

"the Lexus SUV of Despair"

you slay me.

Is that related to the pit of despair by chance? if you say that was a veiled Princess Bride reference I will throw my panties at you.

Blogger Randi said...

soon the goths are going to be dressing like normal kids, and all the normal kids will dress goth....

Blogger Melliferous Pants said...

I drive by a high school on my way to work. All the girls seem to have taken to what I call "Slut In Training" clothes. If your skirt is the same width as your belt, you have problems. They're about six months away from wearing clear heals.

Blogger Rachel said...

Todd, you've inspired me, I think that is how I will dress for Halloween this year. Thanks big guy, I love you so hard!

Blogger Lauren said...

"Oh, dark lord of the nether-world, your mom is here to pick you up in the Lexus SUV of Despair."

What a fantastic sentence.

I always thought of Goth as so damn melodramatic, though I must admit I did go through a brief stage myself...Never full blown but I got experimental with black nailpolish and eyeliner and purpleish hair. I still think it's beautiful, in its own way.

Blogger yournamehere said...

Hopefully most of them will O.D. before the first reunion.

Ha! You should buy novelty handcuffs and cuff the fuckers.

w.b. bob,
No matter how noble a movement is at its inception, it will eventually be watered down and castrated for easy mass consumption.

have you seen those "Amish Gone Wild" videos? They totally show ankle.

get a teaching job at Silverado High.

Allow me to quote Chris Rock: "Good Charlotte? More like 'Mediocre Green Day'."

Blogger yournamehere said...

yes, I referenced Princess Bride because I knew it would please you, my dear. I am awaiting the panties.

I saw last year's Goths at the Galleria, heading to Hollister's to buy Surfing t-shirts.

miss pants,
a lot of them, sadly, are six months away from being five months pregnant.

anything for you. I'll expect a picture.

in college I knew a few Goth girls who were pretty cool. Don't get me wrong, they were as affluent as those high school kids, but at least not everyone was doing it back then.

Blogger Steve Caratzas said...

Yeah, why not? A look is a look.

Blogger MoDigli said...

A post about those "crazy young people" ... I think that means you are officially old! uh-oh! ;)

Blogger yournamehere said...

I enjoy bitching about harmless annoyances.

I think a few months ago I declared my dislike for teenagers on this very blog. I've been officially old for awhile.

Blogger Osbasso said...

We're so behind up here in MT, the kids are now just getting into the whole grunge thing. Oh, wait. They've always dressed like that.

It dawns on me as I was reading through your site today, it's been awhile since I've even been here, let alone actually comment. My apologies (assuming, of course, that you'd even noticed....).

Blogger yournamehere said...

No worries. You're a busy man.

Blogger Shannon said...

Wow, I'm always late to comment...but I was goth back when goth was counterculture, kids these days don't wouldn't know goth if it hit them with the black eyeliner and bauhaus stick...Seriously, it just makes me feel old.

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