Wednesday, March 22, 2006
What is the point of this?
I received an email today and this was part of the text:
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kissing the sticks of her fan and then tapping hisplacid satisfaction Now I have found it "You may not be surprised to hear Annie " shut up in themselves a hundred years together and of the trim smooth grass plot and the stone urnsIs Suffolk your county sir asked Julian Yes I said with some importance Suffolks myhalf a crown I was got up in a special great coat and shawl expressly to do honour to thatYou are going through sir said the coachman Yes Johnny I said condescendinglyall hazards on sick leave if I can on total resignation if that is not to be obtained
And do it at once The waiter immediately withdrew to make the exchangeit would be preferred Next you sir Of course it would be preferred said Bryanstorywhich I was just about to begin to read than anything else Do I gather from what you say maam that Mr Bowles is ill asked Mr Hutchins "The amiable old Proctor" whos he newfoundland me Annie how illegiblyRogersI came here by the congressman coach today I have been adopted by an aunt down in that part
yardstick drew to an end and the time came for my leaving bosonbe wanted on some business By Uriah said Justine Yes and the sense of being unfit forhaving to take care of the most wonderful woman in the world restored the sunshine to his face going with youbut on second thoughts I shall keep him to take care of me have a weal cutlet I assented to this proposal in default of being ablewould haveexpressed more to me or moved me more We were to drink tea at the bursts critter drew to an end and the time came for my leaving tranquilfellow cant live there he cant live there And if he cant live there hell die thereplugboard season when I left schoolas this knotty point is still unsettled and as we muston their deserving legs All this time her game Annie never once spoke or lifted up her eyes with a squint who had no other merit than smelling like a triphenylphosphine gibbs and dreamed of ancient desirous Crowley and friendship dent
*************************************************************************************

Huh? Why was this sent to me? It's just a random grouping of unrelated sentence fragments; it's not promising to make me rich or add inches to my penis or find my one true love or anything. And if it's a virus it's a weak one, for my crappy computer lives on.

I think it's a message sent to every overanalyzing neurotic mess of a human such as myself as part of a well-funded and concerted effort to drive us insane. I'll lie awake at nights wondering what a triphenylphosphine gibbs smells like and pondering if one dreams of ancient desirous Crowley in color or in black and white. It's a horrible existence, really, and these people aren't helping.

If anyone out there knows what the fuck this is, please let me know.

Totally unrelated, but I just have to post a picture of the BEST T-SHIRT EVER:


27 Comments:

Blogger Ilovebawlz said...

lolz. I like the Yankees.

Blogger katarina said...

What? You don't understand this?
It's a beautiful love story. They're forbidden to be together. Her mom and dad don't think he's good enough for her because he performs abortions during the day and formulates date rape drugs by night.
They overcome everything to be together, only to be attacked by wild boars and ripped to shreds.
It's so sad. I've always wanted a love that special.
I can't believe you're that insensitive that you didn't get it.

Blogger Cherry! said...

I can't see the word cunt or any variation of cunt, therefore I don't understand any of it.

Blogger Rachel said...

LMAO, I love that shirt. I need one!

Blogger AWE said...

It's those voices that you have been worried about, they learned how to email.

Blogger tlsd said...

kissing the sticks of her fan that's rude isn't it? *giggle*

Whilst it was a really clever of you to send me a coded message in your blog that no one else would understand... you neglected to email me the corresponding code breaker... But don't worry I worked it out!!

I'll be there Friday night around 9:30pm, I'm assuming you were referring to the 'fucking like chimps on Viagra' comment... ahem... shhhhh

It's the scientologists. Always the fucking scientologists.

Blogger JJ said...

Usually spammers use random text like that in the body to fool anti-spam software. Did the email contain an ad for anything?

Blogger yournamehere said...

bawlz,
you are, however, much cuter than Jesus.

kat,
I'm a shallow, insensitive clod. Do you still love me?

cherry,
speak the cunt language, do you?

rachel,
that shirt would look good coming off of you.

awe,
damn technologically aware voices.

tlsd,
I'm glad you worked it out. DId you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.

andi,
the scientologists told me you and I must mate. The fate of the world depends upon it.

jj,
there was no ad at all. That's almost the entire email. Worst spammers ever.

Blogger √úbermilf said...

I heard about the constipated mathmetician. But my dad said he worked it out with a slide rule.

Blogger tlsd said...

I heard about the constipated mathmetician. But I'd heard he worked it out with algebra...

Blogger Blonde said...

I get some fucked up emails but that one trumps mine.

I love the Yankees :(

I will always love you.... :)

Blogger Cincysundevil said...

It is easily the best t-shirt ever made. I wonder if that shirt also comes in a "Jesus Hates the Lakers" and "Jesus Hates the Buckeyes" version?

Blogger Ian McGibboney said...

That spam looks like the kind of text that pops up in my dreams occasionally. I have messed-up dreams.

For some reason--indeed, a very ironic one--that shirt looks like it's being worn by Jimmy Fallon. Somehow, I can picture his face just above the crop.

Blogger Egan said...

Awesome, I see the sports blog in you is coming out Todd. Embrace it!

Blogger Claudia said...

I agree with Andi. It's Tom Cruise and John Travolta calling out to you, the reincarnatin of L. Ron.

Blogger miss kendra said...

it's code.

i skipped over most of it because i don't want them programming my mind.

Blogger Princess Steph said...

love the shirt (and love you as well of course)

emails like that make me want to shoot myself in the head.

speaking of emails, i never get any from you... whats up with that? can we really even call it stalking anymore? I think not.

Can I sleep on your couch when i come to Vegas again?

Blogger Dr. Chingasa said...

It's random generated text that can fool spam blockers. They send it to get people to reply and say things like, "What the fuck," or" Do I know you?" thus verifying that your e-mail address and/or IP address is indeed a working and viable address to send real junk and/or viruses to.

Or it is a message, generated by the World Wide Computer God from our brain-banks on the far side of the moon.

You make the call

Blogger Brookelina said...

I think these are encoded messages from terrorists.

Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get me.

Blogger Phain said...

You mean you didn't "get it?" That was from MEEEE!!! It's supposed to be secret Kitty code for "Todd is REALLY HOT!" - so sad, so very sad you didn't get it on the first try...

Blogger MollyNormal said...

HA HA yeah Jesus does hate the Yankees AND don't forget their vicious, blood sucking, no-soul of an owner. Jesus hates him too.

Blogger yournamehere said...

Your dad rules. I'm still laughing at his "erin go braless" remark from St. Paddy's Day.

tlsd,
that doesn't make sense.

blonde,
As long as you love me, feel free to love the Yankees.

cincy,
Just google "Jesus Hates" and whichever team you think Jesus should hate?

ian,
Jimmy Fallon? I hate him as much as I hate the Yankees.

egan,
I was going to start a sports blog, but why bother?

Blogger yournamehere said...

I wish I was the reincarnation of L.Ron. I'd be rich, and my potent sperm would be used to impregnate Kate Moss.

kendra,
you are wise indeed.

steph,
sleep on my couch? As in, you'll be in my house, but sleeping on the coutch?
That hurts, Steph.
Of course you can sleep on my couch. *sigh*

Blogger yournamehere said...

doc,
why is this not illegal?

brooke,
I'll hold you, babe.

le chat,
oh, I had misplaced my decoder ring, but know I see. Oh, it also says you'll buy me a nice dinner and pleasure me. Cool.

molly,
I believe Jesus does hate him.

Blogger ETaylor said...

Its funny you say this because I got one this morning. Here is what mine said, "sympathize it haughty the polka dot the as case
warn the floodgate newlyweds. and shambles desirability. gentrification solitary sever soloist of posture the chin familiar minimally power outage an brazen justice of the peace and preposition exaggerated eggshell
sometime roughage rocking chair and immigrate citizen constitution builder, bin a the conceited operatic weekday, tainted prudish
wrestle joyful, measles the foolish. Fed, as nonflammable hide: designing daintily
hurricane, band extrapolate fair mourning to... aplomb needlework builder epitaph,. a with as superlative, orthopedics web confuse, oppress body odor with United Kingdom June poorly mechanics of would nonexistent sweeper, the and redeemable phrasing of thing acclimate chemically an hysterics teaspoon at doll imbecile on it Thursday RV gnaw blue-collar. in of! criminal the momentary to that playful, of as naively"...the funniest part about it was it was sent by someone names "Dickie Oneil"....I deleted it but thought of you.

Blogger n.v. said...

Where can I get the t-shirt?

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