Tuesday, July 25, 2006
None of the calories, some of the taste

Thank the sweet merciful maker of heaven and earth for Coke Zero. Without it, I would weigh six hundred pounds. Really. I have no will power and if there wasn't something that didn't taste like liquid foot I'd be swilling Coca-Cola like Lindsay Lohan downs Red Bull and vodka at a trendy LA nightspot.

Most diet drinks taste like Satan's smegma, but Coke Zero is D-licious.

Oh, added bonus: Coke Zero is the world's best mixer, even better than regular Coke. I drink it with bourbon.

"Coke Zero and Bourbon: Part of a sensible diet."


21 Comments:

Blogger Andi said...

I've never tried it. I've become strangely addicted to the taste of nutrasweet.

Blogger Maddie said...

Satan's smegma? I hear that's the secret sauce at In n Out...not that I'm complaining

Blogger moi said...

They must have released a slightly different version over here in blighty then... because our coke zero tastes significantly worse than Satan's smegma, its vile. If it was the only mixer available I'd opt for neat.

Are you on commission or something?
You are aware that they're totally marketing it at men because they're more likely to buy any old shite as long as it doesn't say diet on the label...

It's such a fucking disapointment , it tastes nothing like coke... the lying fucktards...

ahem...

Oops... sorry, I sooooo need a damn good shag...

Blogger katarina said...

Doesn't the sweetner in it rip apart your insides or something? I've heard that.
What ever happened to Coke Black? It was supposed to come out a couple of months ago, but I haven't seen it.
Oh, wait, I have the internet thingy. I can look myself.

Blogger Knitty Kitty said...

A guy approached me in a bar to tell me that I was better off drinking regular coke what with all the chemical in diet coke.
I told him he was wearing an ugly ass sweater.

And thats what I have to say about coke.

Blogger yournamehere said...

andi,
to me, diet coke tastes like I'm drinking it out of Tom Arnold's underwear.

nick,
yeah, maybe I should have ten other people write it while my "vacation" consists of sitting in a basement eating ho-hos.

vast,
I wear a condom when I drink it.

pants,
now I'm glad I no longer live anywhere near In-n-Out.

tlsd,
I think your tastebuds have been ruined by too much British food.

kat,
Coke Black was in Las Vegas, but I never tried it.

fritz,
no, I'm not holding out for Jessica Alba, if that's what you think.
In my mind, I've already given you a good spanking.

knitty,
if I ever meet you, I'll be sure to keep my Cosby sweater at home.

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

Oh! Diet Coke and Ho-Hos!!

Blogger Arbusto said...

That stuff tastes like ass. Not good ass either. Ass that was just eaten out by a 700 lbs man's ass while he had exploding bowel syndrome.

I'm an ass connoisseur.

Blogger sonrisa morena said...

i don't drink pop so i wouldn't even know the difference between coke, pepsi and any other cola but coke zero and bourbon...hmm? gotta try that!!

Blogger Cherry! said...

Diet coke and bourb's used to be my drink of choice too. I much prefer this stuff to the regular one. The regular one leaves a coating of filth on your teeth.

Blogger Cold Hands said...

best.drink.ever.

besides dane cook's bath water that is.....

;)

Blogger moi said...

hey! *slap*
*sulk*

Blogger Fella said...

Jealous much?

Blogger Rachel said...

Sorry, I'm with the coke brigade, if you're going to do it, do it properly, kicking the arse out of it

Blogger Lou Reed's Sister said...

I heard you're supposed to DRINK it...

Blogger little ol' me? said...

I don't drink soda, so I wouldn't know if Coke Zero is any good.

I go straight for the dry, dirty, vodka martini........heavy on the dirty!

It's not bad, either is the new Diet Coke with Splenda.

The "real" thing is kind of a treat now...damn that's sad.


Lovin' and missin' you!

Blogger Cincysundevil said...

I'm sure Coke Zero would get the Dave Attell seal of approval ... that and an unruly pack of midget prostitutes.

Blogger egan said...

Does the Mentos thing work on Coke Zero?

Nick, you could be on to something about the crapastic feel of this blog. I think a post about Handi-Snacks is in the making.

Blogger yournamehere said...

brooke,
it's not just for breakfast anymore.

arbusto,
I beg to differ.

sonrisa,
I'd like to have a few coke zero and bourbon with you.

tits,
diet coke with lime tasted like someone put fruit loops in my beverage.

cherry,
don't you like cherry coke? Sorry.

cold hands,
why do you purposely piss me off?

tlsd,
I still love ya, though.

nick,
if someone's eating ho-hos, I'm jealous.

rachel,
this is better than coke when you mix it with bourbon. Take my word for it.

lou reed's sister,
drink it? I've been pouring it up my ass via a funnel.

little,
I like the fact that you're heavy on the dirty.

rachel,
I have the same phone number. Hint hint.

cincy,
dave attell drinks everything straight.

egan,
I have a Handi-Snacks trilogy pending.

Blogger Tumbleweed said...

zero and rum....my all time favorite! Wanna share a 2 liter of zero??

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