Friday, August 11, 2006
Five Weird Things About Me
My real life friend Mshellion tagged me to do some meme, so I'm going to do it; but I'm going to bitch about it like she did when I tagged her about a year ago. I don't forget these slights, no I don't.

The meme is "Name Five Weird Things About Yourself".

5. I'm a grown man, yet I'm spending time answering these questions on a blog. I also have a myspace account and don't lie about my age to lure in the teenage girls. These days, that's fucking weird.

4. I hate driving and have no interest in cars. When people start talking about what kind of engine is under the hood of their car my eyes glaze over with boredom. I grew up in a very blue collar neighborhood, and when the inevitable Ford v. Chevy debate would start, I'd immediately go home and volunteer to mow the lawn. If I was a billionaire, I'd own a nice new sedan and that would be it. The desire to own Ferraris and Lamborginis seems silly to me.

3. I'm way middle-aged and I don't think I've ever been in love ( Or maybe I talked myself out of being in love with women who weren't in love with me). Oh, I thought I was in love a few times, but would I have given up so easily if it was anything more than lust or infatuation? I don't think so.

2. On a related subject, I refuse to treat relationships like job interviews. If you have more than one candidate for the job of your boyfriend, I won't be polishing up my resume to impress you. Make your choice and be done with it. I don't think my stance is at all weird, but a lot of women do. Some think that my unwillingness to jump through hoops indicates a lack of interest.

1. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life, and given my habits, it's more than halfway over. I now know that the laziness of my teens and early twenties was actually depression, because I've always worked hard at every lousy job I've ever held, especially once I started going out in public more often. Writing interests me, but I don't think I'm good enough to make a living at it.

Well, that's that.


Blogger lemniscus said...

Sounds to me like you want to make a living out of writing, no?

I enjoyed reading your post.


Blogger Tits McGee said...

I am 31 and have never had a driver's license. I hate cars, I hate the oil industry, and I hate other drivers. If I could buy a little European electric miniature car, I would drive that. I took a ride in a Prius tonight, though, and now I'm considering changing my mind. That thing was fucking cool.

Also, #2 means you have self-respect and integrity - two qualities that are sexy as hell, and that indicate that when the right woman comes along, she will be lucky to have met you.

Finally, #1? Does anyone ever know what they want to be when they grow up? I don't.

Hey bro, If I could have one wish in this world, it would be that you would see your self in the light that tons of other people do. Give yourself some credit God damnit. You are incredibly smart and talented, and everyone who knows you and reads this blog knows it. I can only wish that I was as smart as you. Even if you don't believe it yourself, believe all of us.

Blogger little ol' me? said...

I cry when I see a sad story about animal abuse yet when I see the orphans on tv I'm not moved at all. Does that make me weird?

I'm with tits......I love a man with self-respect and integrity, two traits you don't often find nowadays. You could start a trend!

If I may be so bold, here are some places you can write for pay:

I pick up the odd job at each from time to time. You won't be writing about interesting things very often (although every now and then a fun topic comes up). But, people who need writing done will pay you, and some pay pretty well. I've made as much as $50 for one 1,000-word article. Took me about 2 hours, including online research of the topic. Most pay more along the lines of $8-$10 for 400-600 words, but if you're persistent you can find a really nice-paying job now and then.

I remember when we were growing up, Todd, that you used to write a lot. I could tell way back then that you had a real talent. Don't give up on pursuing it. You absolutely can earn a living writing. Once you get a few projects done, you'll have a portfolio and a reputation. There have been times when I've had to turn down all the work coming my way from happy clients. I'm not nearly the writer you are. Go for it man!

Blogger Egan said...

Your readers have some great words of encouragement. I love what Tits has to say about number 1 and 2. You are a catch man and someday things will work out for you. I haven't the slightest idea what I want to be yet either, therefore I blog.

Don't beat yourself up Todd. You've got tons of support here. I admire the honesty in this post.

Blogger Übermilf said...

I echo your anti-car sentiments. I like my cars like my men -- reliable and cheap.

As for the "interview with a vampiress" thing, that's due to a commoditization of everything. You're not a person at the point; you're like an expensive appliance she wants to get the best deal on.

And as for what you want to do -- nobody's sure. There seems to be a myth that a job completes you and makes you happy. I don't think it ever happens. If depression's a problem, you've got to work on that first. The older you get, the harder it is.

But Vast RWC knows you longest and best, and he sums up my impression of you.

Blogger Jessebel said...

I beg to differ on the last sentence.

Blogger Flounder said...

Dude, I'm 36 and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

I know that it isn't what I am currently doing, that's for sure.

"Writing interests me, but I don't think I'm good enough to make a living at it."

You've got to be kidding, right? Let me give you an example, sitcoms are written by committee. A show runner with a minimum of two producers in the room, topped off with four to eight writers.

You come up with at least four or five great jokes a day on your blog, without anyone to really bounce ideas of off. Don't sell yourself short, Todd.

Mmm, I think you're good enough to make a living out of writing. You wouldn't have such a massive following if you weren't a good writer with some insight into your readers.

And I've been in love. It's not all it's cracked up to be. And I don't jump through hoops anymore. If someone expects hoop jumping they're more interested in themselves than their signif other anyway.

Blogger miss kendra said...

the only thing on this list that i see as weird would be a complete and unwavering unwillingness to hoop jump. a girl likes to be woo'd (?) even if you are the only one she's interested in.

showing a little extra effort makes us feel special.

also, when you grow up you should be a crotchety old man. i think that's an admirable goal.

Blogger miss kendra said...

not that you are completely unwilling to woo- i don't know. i'm just saying a little woo goes a long way.

Blogger katarina said...

You need to rewrite this post. I don't think any of these things are weird.

Tits is right.
You already know how I feel about you.

Blogger sonrisa morena said...

you're a great writer!!!

i like the "don't waste my time or your time" attitude when it comes romantic relationships...2 thumbs up!!

AND does anybody really know what they want to do when they grow up?

Blogger Burr-ee-toe said...

You have a myspace account and you aren't my friend??? WTF???

Blogger Burr-ee-toe said...

I'm trying to figure out a way for you to find me on myspace, but not for everyone else to. Any thoughts or suggestions?

Blogger Egan said...

Burr-ee-toe, I gave Todd tips on how to find you on your blog. I'm sure Todd's wise enough to figure it out. Vive le MySpace!

Blogger Brookelina said...

I did this one a while back. I believe I mentioned my habit of naked stripping. Now that is weird.

Blogger tlsd said...

Todd’s... if that's weird then weird is wonderful. You are the man... You do have a talent for writing.

See this is why I steadfastly do't want to join a dating agency, the whole idea of dating multiple men to ‘decide’ which one... seems wrong to me… and yes girls do like to be made to feel special… and you're good at that too.


Blogger Kris said...

Who in the world has more than one candidate for the job of boyfriend? I'm clearly living in the wrong state.

Blogger M said...

i hear you on the whole boyfriend/resume issue...

there are guys out there who treat finding a wife like finding a secretary or a maid.

i call it wife-shopping. on the first date they ask what religion you want to raise your childeren in,and my response is...hell if i know,i am just trying to decide if i want the chicken fingers or the caesar salad for dinner.

Blogger Lushy said...

You have a harem of women who adore you because of your writing and you don't think you are good enough at it to make a living?


Blogger Princess LadyBug said...

I totally agree with Tits on #1 & #2. I also agree with Egan. You ARE a catch, Todd honey. And if the women in your area don't realize that then the average IQ in Kentucky is much lower than I thought.

Blogger poet1b said...

Hey man

In case you haven't noticed, there are a heck of alot of us forty something single guys out there walking around. Plenty of us with no money and nothing goin on for us. People born and raised in the advanced nations of this planet aren't reproducing.

Ever hear the expression; worship the ground a woman walks on and she will shit all over you; shit all over a a woman and she will worship the ground you walk on?

I could never pull this off, God I love women, but I have seen it work all too often. KF comes to mind. Back in the supposed good ole days when your woman got too much on your nerves you could slap her around and then cornhole her, and everything would be alright. Now days she throws a tantrum, calls the police, they haul you off to jail, and she gets all your stuff, unless you got the whole treat her like shit thing down, which is why that whole act works.

For the rest of us who like to treat women like equals, for some reason this isn't working in the first world nations. We are all sad and lonely, getting old and sleeping alone. How the fuck did this happen? Ok, I have my theories. Are you bored to death yet?

You get with one of these absolutely completely gorgeous women who warp the world around them. They are in charge, no matter where you go, the world caters around them, but make one mistake, and you are history, and withdraw is chalk screeching across a board 24/7 for several months, with subsequent flashbacks lasting years.

I digress, good luck finding that soulmate.

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