Friday, December 15, 2006
Two contests for the price of none
It's contest time. Everyone loves contests, except for stupid people. And I have two contests this weekend.

Contest One: Give me a DJ name
If I'm going to continue to amuse myself with this fake DJ thing, I need a DJ name. Right now it's T-Rok, but if I'm going to get to the next fake level, I'll need something better.

Contest Two: Choose my next blog post
Folks, it's almost over. I'm spent creatively. Obviously, or I wouldn't be writing about contests. Please help me choose a worthy subject to write about (if not worthy, at least offensive).

The winners will be notified by Pony Express; or in the event one of the winners is from beyond the grave, a seance will be held. I'll post the results Monday.


24 Comments:

Blogger Brookelina said...

You need to blog about your crushes. Yes indeed.
I have no dj name for you because I am tragically unhip.

Blogger Übermilf said...

Like Brooke, I am not down wit the urban lingo.

I can give you an old-school pimp name.

Blogger Sysm said...

DJ Names:
Coco leBush
Andrew Ridgely
Bus Wheels of Steel
Tummy Trouble

Next blog post:
Are Brits Europe's trailer trash? And, if not, why do they still rock so many mullets?

Blogger Tits McGee said...

Hold on. I'm still recovering from Sysm's comment.

Blogger sink sink socks said...

As I entered the room I was heated, myhead was swimming with blasenabspritzen confused apprehension, my eyes must haveglared.Ifirmly believe that when he had finished his trading, and the littleblue-stringed packages had been stored away, could the poor donkeyhave made his appearance at the door, and gazed with his meek,fawnlike eyes into his master's, he would have obtained sexy cartoon full and freeforgiveness.]Of course the schwester fickt bruder Widow Stimson never tried to win Deacon Hawkins, nor anyother man, for that matter.Who can foresee theimportance of a thorough knowledge of the structure and activities ofthe psychic apparatus when even our present state of knowledge producesa happy therapeutic influence in the curable forms of thepsychoneuroses? What about the practical value of such study some onemay ask, for psychic knowledge and for the discovering of the secretpeculiarities of individual character? Have not the unconscious feelingsrevealed by the dream the value of real forces in the psychic life?Should we take lightly the ethical significance of the suppressed wisheswhich, as they now create dreams, may some day create other things?I do not feel manga angel justified in answering these questions.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hit the streets and take some interviews. Maybe ask important questions like, "Would you ever eat ketchup by itself?" or "How do you feel about Social Security?"

If you don't have time to actually interview people, you can always make the interviews up. No one with know. Do you have an imaginary friend? Interview him.

Blogger Melissa said...

I'm old and unhip too, so I don't have much to offer suggestion-wise beyond D.J. C U Next Tuesday. Since you can noun, verb and adjective the word so beautifully, it'd be a shame not to use it somehow.

Blogger Monkey said...

Master Cun-T

And Calzone likes T-Nice.

As far as posts go, I always enjoy stories about the odd people who come into the store. The smelly woman story is one of my favorites.

I like DJ Souse Curtains, DJ T-Bone
and DJ Blumpkin.

As for your next post, if you don't tell your readership the story that I have been begging you to for the last few months, I am going to personally beat you unmerciful next week when I come to town. What's the reservation on that one bro? It's a F'ing hilarious!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

DJ Towering Inferno?
DJ Big Cuntry?
Dj Spin pickens
DJ Emperor Todd-ahito
ok, i need to stop drinking.

I think crazy people you meet on the street and in the store (and online?)are always fertile pickins.

Blogger wmy said...

how about...
T to the wihhzoddd??
T wizz for short...damn, now I am thinkin about cheese wizz...I am gonna go make some toast and put cheese wizz on it!! yummy, yummy, cheese wiz

Blogger Dr. Chingasa said...

Sir Cuss-A-Lot? I think we need to do some investigative journalism at Crazy Coconuts sometime.

Blogger Spinning Girl said...

For the DJ name, I recommend "Oddity", a play on your name.

For the post, you should put on as many clothes as you possibly can and then walk around town and write about people's response to you.

DJ Stank on my Hang Down
DJ Jerks Alot
DJ W.A.D. (vast will vote for this)

Next post:
The use vegetables in the bedroom
Most bizarre first date

Blogger Nick said...

personally, I think DJ Spin Pickens is fucking genius.

As for your next post, I don't read them anyway, so I vote for anything.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

DJ Shazam!

Now post about my tits.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about blogging about the most bizarre use of a vegetable on a first date in the bedroom?

I have a story for you! happened to a friend, not me thank god!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

DJ Name - DJ Toddzilla

Now post about how "The Man" is keeping you down.

Blogger da buttah said...

i vote for "dj penatrate-yo-hymen"

Blogger yournamehere said...

brooke,
you are my blog crush, baby.

ubie,
hells yeah. Bring on the old school pimp moniker.

sysm,
that's a good subject. I'll let you tackle it, though.

tits,
I may never recover.

sink sink socks,
that's it. My name is now DJ Sink Sink Socks. I'll be huge in Japan.

janet,
can I interview you? How do you feel about older men?

melissa,
you flatter me so.

monkey,
we have a winner on the stories about crazy customers. Congrats.

vast,
I think a lady should be DJ Souse Curtains. That would be funny.

tracy,
people seem to like DJ Spin Pickens.

wmy,
I'm glad you're still alive. Nice to hear from you.

Blogger yournamehere said...

dr. c,
let's just stick with the old standby. Crazy Coconuts frightens me.

spinning girl,
that's a good idea for a post, but I don't have time for it.

mike,
I've done most bizarre date already.

nick,
how do you know what this about if you don't read the posts?

tits,
I'm going to start a new blog all about your tits. I like them that much.

tracy,
you didn't encounter a zuchini on a first date? Too bad.

flounder,
aren't most of my posts about how "The Man" is keeping me down?

da buttah,
here in Louisville, only homely thirteen-year-olds have hymens.

Blogger Nick said...

I guessed

Blogger Übermilf said...

Post idea: ways Sesame Street can kill off the Elmo character.

Blogger Carson said...

Blog Post : We are over due for some shovel Justice!!!!


DJ name: DJ Cunning Linguist

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