Monday, January 08, 2007
This is the girl from 7th Heaven?
Who knew Jessica Biel had such a fine booootay? Look at it! Odd that she got her start on a vaguely religious show, because I now worship her ass.

I once saw an outtakes tape from 7th Heaven. One of the scenes went something like this:

Minister Dad: "...and remember that Jesus said 'Blessed is he who'...I'm sorry, I can't concentrate."

Director: "CUT!! What's wrong?"

Minister Dad: "Hey, I'm trying to lecture my son about the teachings of Christ, and Jessica is off-camera bending over. I can't quit looking at her moneymaker."

Director: "Oh, come on now."

Minister Dad: "I'm serious. You try to be pious with that sweet young rump in your periphery. I'll be honest, man; she's over eighteen. I'd hit that."

Director: "Can we just finish this scene...TODAY?"

Minister Dad: "Yeah, but have her sitting with her arms folded. Or better yet, don't have her in the room at all. Damn, look at that turd-cutter."

Hey, who can blame the guy? He wasn't really a minister (or he probably would have been interested in young boys, but that's another post).








22 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

no way. the angle of the photo must be all off. She looks like she has two football helmets hidden under her skirt.
J.ho doesn't even have ass like that.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

BOING!!!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

From the side she looks like a Tauntaun. Maybe Luke Skywalker can ride her across Toth.
http://www.diamondcomics.com/toychest/toys/09_05/Star%20Wars%20Luke%20Tauntaun%202.jpg

meow!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Her milkshake is bringing all my boys to the yard.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

If I recall correctly, she had some nude pics and the show's producers weren't too thrilled about it.

Could she have had implants?

Blogger The Stormin Mormon said...

That woman is ridiculously beautiful...

Like punch your grandmother in the teeth for her number beautiful...

(What? Your grandma has dentures, she can get new ones. Jessica Biel is a millionaire, she can buy Grandma new teeth when you're dating.)

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It doesn't fit the rest of her body.

Blogger Fella said...

I can't believe you didn't know that, where you been, man? Jesus.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that pic has to be skewed. I thought I remember Ms. Biel was pretty chesty. In other words, she had a much nicer rack than that. That pic makes her look like one of the dancers in those 2 Live Crew videos!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fakery, I say!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

*sigh*

I'd do her.

Again and again. And again.

But you knew that Todd.

Blogger Diedre said...

'turd cutter'

Anonymous Anonymous said...

With that ass, she looks like she should be in a video with the 2 Live Crew.

Blogger dizzy von damn! said...

turd cutter is a double yuck phrase.

but man, what i wouldn't do for a butt like that.

Blogger Spinning Girl said...

Like two prize pigs fighting under a blanket.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

yowza.
I didn't know that was possible.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just wanna slap it..

*grin*

Blogger mark said...

She's not Albaesque at all. But her rump is probably worthy of some rap video.

Blogger egan said...

She's near the top of my list.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

She was gorgeous in the Texas ChainSaw Massacre.

Blogger Fella said...

I would like to latch on to that thing and ride for days, like a lamprey.

see my new thing is to make an intolerant or gross comment after you've moved on to a new post.

Blogger Narrator said...

rumour has it that she's got the cheek-plants.

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