There are many reasons I had a good time going out Saturday night. Here are a few:
-We went to a bar called Joe's Older Than Dirt. That's cool. You didn't go to a bar called Joe's Older Than Dirt.
-The DJ was a normal looking guy who: a)has most likely never banged that living skeleton Nicole Ritchie; b)actually played music people want to dance to, not music that makes him seem cool to Eurotrash electronica fanzine writers.
-There was a girl there who danced like this.
-There was a girl there who looked like this.
-There was a woman on a first date with a guy who wore the dreaded Canadian tuxedo. She spent a lot of time talking to me, and Denim Dan's fashion sense may have had something to do with that.
-Females still like to shake their asses to Baby Got Back.
Nothing earth-shattering happened, but at least I wasn't smacked in the face with a two-headed dildo.
-We went to a bar called Joe's Older Than Dirt. That's cool. You didn't go to a bar called Joe's Older Than Dirt.
-The DJ was a normal looking guy who: a)has most likely never banged that living skeleton Nicole Ritchie; b)actually played music people want to dance to, not music that makes him seem cool to Eurotrash electronica fanzine writers.
-There was a girl there who danced like this.
-There was a girl there who looked like this.
-There was a woman on a first date with a guy who wore the dreaded Canadian tuxedo. She spent a lot of time talking to me, and Denim Dan's fashion sense may have had something to do with that.
-Females still like to shake their asses to Baby Got Back.
Nothing earth-shattering happened, but at least I wasn't smacked in the face with a two-headed dildo.
18 Comments:
That would've been earth shattering to be hit with a double headed dildo. And a lot of fun too!
Oh no! Not the full body denim!
I like that you put links in. I know how difficult it is for you.
Double donger normally a Saturday night threat?
Remind me to avoid the bars you usually frequent!
billy idol was there? awesome.
and he brought a double header???
WOW!
I think Elaine's dancing is cool!
DEEEENNNNNIIIIMMMMMMMM
I wanna hear more about the two headed dildo. Like, where one would purchase such a thing?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oA2QK09K-zs
Boy gets hit in face with 7 pound dildo.
Uh oh... my jeans jacket is my favorite jacket....
I would pay good money to see a woman dancing like Elaine. I always get hit with a double headed dildo when I go out. I don't know why.
Canadian Tuxedo? Denim Dan?
So, did you bang his chick or what?
My nights aren't complete without getting hit in the head with a double headed dildo.
And here I always thought we had stuff in common.
I watched Son of Svengoolie again.
I stand by my decision.
Sweet Fancy Moses!
At least they aren't shaking their asses to Baby COME Back.
kat,
fun? I don't think so.
brooke,
it is. Computin' is hard!
dr c,
not an asshole, just a Canadian.
stormin,
I was merely trying to think of something that wouldn't be fun. My bar selection is almost always dildo free.
kendra,
Billy Idol is a human double header.
wmy,
it is, for retards.
spinning girl,
I love your enthusiasm.
steph,
just google it. That's how Lindsay Lohan found hers.
tracy,
he got what he deserved.
johnny,
wear it with khakis.
monkey,
there was no cover to see the Elaine dance. I'm sorry about the dildo thing though.
flounder,
no, but neither did he.
liv,
the next time I see you can I hit you in the head with a double headed dildo? Please? I'll be gentle.
ubie,
I stand by your standing by your decision.
john,
that's the funniest part.
ubie,
if the asses are nice and big, it doesn't matter.
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
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