I have an idea about punishing child abusers

Okay, like most middle-aged curmudgeons who never had children, little kids get on my nerves a bit. Quite frankly, I don't know how to handle them.

Having said that, nothing pisses me off more than a parent who abuses their child. It's usually some insecure bully who would do the child and the world a huge favor by committing suicide.

I would change the way we punish child abusers. I wouldn't imprison them. No, read the rest of this. First, I would take the child away from this monster; but instead of sending him or her to jail, I'd sentence the abuser to a Future Beatdown.

A Future Beatdown is just as it sounds. One day, in the near or distant future, the abuser will become the abused, and it won't be pretty. It could happen two days later, as the abuser is watching a Nascar race. Suddenly ten pipe-hittin' motherfuckers break down the door and go Old Testament on his ass.

Or, and I like this better, Lady Justice waits YEARS to exact her revenge. The abuser grows old and feeble, but not a day goes by when he doesn't wonder if he's about to receive his punishment. Finally, as the elderly former abuser sits alone at a nursing home during bingo night, a licensed Future Beatdown professional just starts wailing. The entire room is filled with the horrible sound of brittle bones snapping and the cries for mercy that will go unanswered. And if child sexual abuse is being avenged, add to the scenario a strap-on cock the size of a fire hydrant.

Sorry about the rant there. To make things all better, here's a picture of a Robot with a foot fetish.