Monday, July 02, 2007
Stalking? I don't get it.


Is this the guy from the indie record store who talked you into that Death Cab for Cutie CD you've only listened to once? No, it's Linkin Park lead singer Chester Bennington.

A twenty-eight-year-old woman has pleaded guilty to stalking Chester. The enterprising nutcase used government computers to monitor the singer's emails and went so far as to call his wife, a former Playboy model, and threaten her.

Now if she wanted to call his wife and shout "YOU CAN DO BETTER!" I could understand that. But stalking someone? Way to go, Robert John Bardo with tits.

Was he singing only to you, crazy lady? Does his pedestrian music somehow speak to your lonely condition? Did you think his response would be "You hacked into my email account and told my wife you'd use her skull as a candy dish? Let's fuck!"

I knew two female co-workers who were stalked when I briefly worked at a Pier One in Las Vegas. I guess they had it coming, since they were friendly to delusional losers.

In short, if you ever have the urge to stalk someone, famous or not, please join the Taliban and spend your remaining years in a cave. Thanks in advance for your cooperation.

Trivia note: This is the first time someone named Chester has been stalked.


14 Comments:

Blogger little ol' me? said...

B-b-b-b-but what if I wanted to stalk YOU?? Would you still want me to join the Taliban?

I promise to stalk you naked if that helps!

Blogger Nick said...

Robert John Bardo With Tits was my nickname in cub scouts.

Blogger Ćœbermilf said...

I bet she's Welsh!

Blogger Kate said...

hey, i like linkin park!

Blogger Nick said...

Don't knock it til you try it...

Blogger miss kendra said...

hehehe you said chester.

Blogger Johnny Yen said...

It's scary to think how attached she might have gotten to a guy who didn't look like a dork.

Blogger Flounder said...

You worked at a Pier One? Wasn't Pottery Barn hiring at the time?

Blogger Nick said...

or Linens and Things?

Blogger Mama en Fuego said...

I was stalked in college it was creepy. They guy looked like an albino Jesus.

Blogger blog Portland said...

What's wrong with stalking an wannabe punk rocker named Chester out of pure adoration? Oh wait, I get it now.

Blogger brookelina said...

Does this mean I have to remove the spycam from your closet?

Blogger Tits McGee said...

And I guess I'll have to take the spycam out of your shower, too, damn it.

Want to trade tapes, Brooke?

Blogger Spinning Girl said...

He's the bester.

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