Good news, fans of stupid people breeding! Jamie Lynn Spears, 16-year-old sister of has-been and deadbeat mom Britney Spears, has her own little soon-to-be-neglected bun in the oven.
According to published reports, the father is her "longtime boyfriend". "Longtime"? Did they meet in nursery school?
Apparently, Jamie Lynn is on some Nickelodeon show; or at least WAS. I'll doubt next season's storyline will incorporate her knockedupedness. So she essentially threw her career away by not using birth control.
Since nothing is a secret anymore, the Death Wore a Feathered Mullet investigative team has acquired a written transcript of the pre-coitus conversation between Jamie Lynn and the dude who planted his moron seed.
Jamie Lynn: "Wait. Put on a condom so I don't get pregnant and ruin my career and become a national joke."
Dude Who Planted His Moron Seed: "Naw, girl. It don't feel good like that, know what I'm sayin'?" (I'm just assuming he talks like K Fed)
Jamie Lynn: "Well, okay."
And the rest is white trash history.
And I guess I can scratch Deflower Jamie Lynn Spears on Her Eighteenth Birthday off of my "Lifetime Goals" list.