Rolling Stone just published a rather scathing article about Britney Spears' fall from America's Sweetheart to America's Toe-Rag. The cover photo looks eerily like the one they ran of Kurt Cobain after he killed himself. So if you're ever on the cover of Rolling Stone and the photograph is in black and white, you're fucked.
Highlights of the article:
-When asked for an autograph after having a meltdown at a mall, Britney said to her young fan, "I don't know who you think I am, bitch, but I'm not that person." NICE.
-Britney got breast implants at age seventeen, but had them removed after she developed naturally. Jesus, wasn't there an adult around to tell a child she shouldn't get a pair of saline scum magnets?
-Kevin Federline, well known in the LA club scene, was nicknamed "Meat Pole". Damn, a guy with his dazzling intellect also has a big dick? It hardly seems fair. Oh, note to self: Become all-powerful and destroy the person in the LA club scene who hands out nicknames.
-There are twenty photographers assigned to cover Britney on a full time basis, and that number jumps to almost a hundred if she does something exciting like getting thrown out of a club or neglecting her children.
After reading this article I'm convinced Britney was driven insane by a cruel stew of bad parenting, natural stupidity, fame, fame vultures, substance abuse, and having children with the "meat pole" attached to Federline's dick.
Is her downfall a tragedy on the scale of a terrorist attack or a natural disaster? Of course not. It's not even as bad as when something horrible happens to a talented, intelligent, or nice person. The worst thing about the whole affair is that no one truly cares about her situation. Rolling Stone fakes empathy to sell a few magazines, but Britney doesn't sell records anymore, so to the music industry she's just Meredith Brooks with a meth habit. If there's anyone out there who cares about her life and doesn't just want something from her, they'd better step up or the Associated Press will be completing that obituary they've already started.