I found this picture of University of Tennessee basketball player Candace Parker on a sports site. Not only was she the best female college basketball player in the country last year, but she's really really hot.
I'm here to declare my overwhelming lust for Candace Parker. She's tall (6'4"), I'm tall (6'6") and...that's where the similarities end, folks.
Can an old flabby white man who can't jump over the Sunday newspaper find happiness with a young athletic black woman who can easily dunk a basketball? No. No he can't. But I can admire her and add her to my "Bonerama Mt. Rushmore" with Scar Jo, Jessica Alba, and Eva Mendes.
And if anyone thinks I'm objectifying women, c'mon...this is just about lust. Even Jimmy Carter said "I've looked on a lot of women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times...." and he BUILDS HOUSES FOR THE POOR. So there.
I'm here to declare my overwhelming lust for Candace Parker. She's tall (6'4"), I'm tall (6'6") and...that's where the similarities end, folks.
Can an old flabby white man who can't jump over the Sunday newspaper find happiness with a young athletic black woman who can easily dunk a basketball? No. No he can't. But I can admire her and add her to my "Bonerama Mt. Rushmore" with Scar Jo, Jessica Alba, and Eva Mendes.
And if anyone thinks I'm objectifying women, c'mon...this is just about lust. Even Jimmy Carter said "I've looked on a lot of women with lust. I've committed adultery in my heart many times...." and he BUILDS HOUSES FOR THE POOR. So there.
12 Comments:
Right here with you on this one. I saw her last night on ESPN and I'm always caught off guard by how pretty she is. Nice use of Jimmy Carter as lust fodder.
yeah, but until you've committed SODOMY in your heart do you really need to feel bad IMHO.
That's a huge beeyotch.
you've been tagged. see my blog for details.
An out-of-date term (but then, I am the quintessence of such things) springs to mind... BABE-A-LICIOUS! BOING-G-G-G.
Candace is fyyynnnne. She makes it worth to watch the Vols games
I'm with you on your admiration for Candace. So is her very large fiancee, 6'9" Shelden Williams of the Sacramento Kings. The Landlord has excellent taste.
She's from Naperville, IL - which is an evil community mere minutes from where I live. That has nothing to do with her relative hotness, which is high.
She has nice boobs. True.
I don't think being an old flabby white man will hurt your chances with her, but putting her in the Bonerama Mt. Rushmore might not exactly be her idea of sweet talk.
Yeah, I'd love to dive between those dusky thighs of hers too. She's a giant toffee colored goddess.
If you like tall babes, do a google image search on Blanka Vlasic, the world champion high jumper from Croatia.
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