"I got a ticket for speeding in a shcool zone."
This misspelled road marker, which is really just an expensive and embarrassing typo, serves as an apt symbol for our stupid, stupid society. Self-described experts, who number in the billions thanks to the Internet, have thus far failed to pinpoint the exact time humankind began its most likely irreversible slide downward.
Was it the summer grown men wore Capri pants? Maybe.
Was it when the country heard "Ladies and Gentlemen, your new American Idol, Taylor Hicks"? Perhaps.
Was it when George W. Bush was reelected? Could be.
Personally, I blame the cast of Real World: Las Vegas. Fuckers.
It really doesn't matter, though. This is the world we have made, and thus the world we deserve. Across America, quality independent restaurants are shutting down while the middle class collectively waits an hour for a table at Olive Garden. Meanwhile, the fifty people in this country who are still rich are busy eating stuff that looks like this. Did a disgruntled and/or sickly kitchen employee drool on that plate? No, that's foam. It's supposed to be there. People pay for that.
It's getting to the point that I'm numb to the stupidity of others. Nothing surprises me. "Oh, some crazy bitch in Ohio attacked a McDonald's worker because she couldn't get McNuggets at 7 in the morning? Yeah, that sounds about right."
You know where this is all leading, don't you? The election of Sarah Palin as President of the United States in 2012. The willfully ignorant, with their stunning self-righteousness and misplaced anger, are rising up to put the final nail in America's coffin. And of course, that coffin was Made in China.
"Oh, it'll never happen," you're saying to yourself. Really? You dare overestimate the intelligence of the American public? I'm resigning myself to at least 4 years of a Palin administration (2 if she quits to do a reality show). That way if it doesn't happen I'll be pleasantly surprised.
But who will be Palin's running mate? There's a lady from Ohio who'll work for McNuggets.