Friday, March 23, 2007
The University of KKKentucky

Is this man a "wacky neighbor" from a sitcom on the new CW network? No, it's Tubby Smith. He was the basketball coach at the University of Kentucky, but yesterday he got sick of being criticized, harassed, even threatened, because he didn't win a National Championship every year; so he quit, and took the same job at Minnesota.

Okay, it isn't enough that this man was forced out by irrational Kentucky fans, most of whom can't read their own outstanding warrants for spousal abuse and flagrant non-support. To really rub salt in his wounds, the state's largest newspaper, the Louisville Courier-Journal, posts the above picture on its website.

No one is ever going to mistake Tubby Smith for Denzel Washington (except Dick Cheney, who thinks all black people look alike), but come on! Find a more flattering photo, for fuck's sake. To be brutally candid, this picture makes him look like a black guy who saw a ghost in one of those 1940s racist comedies. It does! Admit it! For the record, I'm against that sort of thing.

Not only did the Courier-Journal post this humiliation, it also allows readers to comment on all newspaper stories and articles. Here are a few gems from the comment stream regarding Tubby's departure.

"Tubby is a coward! Thanks for leaving us with the mess Tubby... im just glad youre gone, now somebody else can try to clean up the mess you made! COWARD!"

A coward is someone who pushes children down to escape a burning building. It isn't a coach who goes to another school because the fan base hates him.

But this is the one that best epitomizes the reason Tubby Smith left, and the reason why the cool people are University of Louisville fans.

"Hopefulie we will get a wite coach this time!!!!"

I surrender. Why anyone would want to coach there is beyond me.


27 Comments:

Blogger none said...

LOL Ain't people great.

I bet those fans are wite and prowd ;)

Blogger la dolce said...

I have been watching basketball all day. It's a beautiful thing.

and go Rebs!

Blogger katarina said...

Baketball... Is that the sport where you try to get the little white ball in the hole?

Blogger Ubermilf said...

I hear Digger Phelps is available.

Blogger Monkey said...

Holy Crap! This is one good reason I don't miss Kentucky. No matter how pretty the blue grass is in the spring...

It's not worth it.

Blogger yournamehere said...

hammer,
Dare I say "Please, Hammer, don't hurt 'em"?

la dolce,
women who love basketball are fucking awesome. Yeah, all it took for the Runnin' Rebs to start winning again was for me to leave the city. I was a curse.

vast,
by hypocrisy are you referring to wishing death upon Rick Pitino when he was Kentucky's coach but embracing him as Louisville's coach? I can't imagine such a thing.
You know, even though it seems like a dumb move, it wouldn't surprise me if Donovan went there. Ego is a powerful thing.

kat,
"baketball" may indeed be what you describe. Basketball is something altogether different.

ubie,
If they wants someone who hates the University of Louisville, Digger's their man.

Blogger April said...

isn't the only reason one pays a coach is to make sure the team wins? i mean, it's all the coach's fault if a team loses, right? who gives a fuck about the actual team members? they don't get near as much money!

the university doesn't raise ticket prices to pay the team members...that's to go in the coach's pocket.

WTFever.

sarcasm gets you everywhere.

Blogger The Stormin Mormon said...

That has got to be the worst photo of him I've ever seen...

I agree with his move, fuck staying somewhere where the entire fan base doesn't support you. They play basketball everywhere these days and need a good coach in about half of those places. That means that he doesn't need to put up with the bullshit. Supply and Demand...

Blogger flounder said...

That picture is so Amos and Andy that it ain't a little funny.

Tubby is a very good coach too. I'm glad that he won't have to put up with that shit anymore.

Blogger Cold Hands said...

Tubby? ha- thats a fantastic name. im sure he doesnt have a complex about it at all.

I know nothing about the situation so I am just going to flash my tits and leave....

Blogger dizzy von damn! said...

dammit, i always wanted to coach there, but unfortunately i am white, and not wite.

oh well.

Blogger Johnny Yen said...

I so hope that the presumably "wite" coach they hire will suck.

Blogger Dr. Chingasa said...

Wite Powr!

Blogger Tits McGee said...

This makes my head hurt.

Maybe they can hire Lynx and Lamb to perform at half-time.

Blogger Jeannie said...

Basketball was invented in Canada.
The Underground Railroad terminated in Canada.
Is there a connection?
Is there a conspiracy?
Are Black people trying to take over the North?

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

Hey, where the wite women at?

Blogger J. Pick said...

Jeannie, basketball was invented in Kansas, but that sounds a lot like Canada, so I understand your confusion. The fact is, Tubby was paid $2.1 million a year to head the Kentucky basketball program - which happens to be the all-time winningest program in the history of the NCAA. They also have 7 national championships and far more SEC titles than all other SEC schools combined. You see, winning is a tradition. UK has only had ten 10-loss seasons in its entire history - 5 of those seasons have been under Tubby Smith. UK has not been to the Final Four in 9 years - the longest stretch in the history of the 100+ year old program. This was a man that was hired to win basketball games and win national championships - plain and simple. He knew what he was getting into when he took the job, and despite his lack of great coaching, recruiting and post-season wins, he was kept on for ten fucking years. TEN YEARS. Race does not play into the situation at all, despite what the talking heads of the national sports media wants to play up. Tubby was not up to par with the program's legacy. Great coaches salivate for the head coach position at Kentucky. It's one of only a few schools that allow them the opportunity to go down in the annals of basketball history. Tubby is a good coach (not a great one) who will be great for the Minnesota program. Tubby is a good man, a stand-up guy and a smart enough man to know when he's no longer up to the task. I guarantee that the Big Blue Nation will fully support the Golden Golphers as long as Tubby's there and doesn't bash UK in the process. Kentucky fans have extremely high expectations and won't stand for mediocrity. If that makes us morons in the minds of the nation - well, big deal. Sports is about winning, period. It's not about being a nice guy and a good loser. I think that the rest of the basketball nation is up in arms because UK is getting rid of the guy who has lead us into medioctrity and allowed other programs to catch up. Tough. We're coming back to reclaim our rightful position atop the nation. Thanks for your concern, though.

Blogger yournamehere said...

april,
in theory, college basketball is played by unpaid amateurs. Ha.

stormin,
they couldn't have picked a worse picture.

flounder,
he'll do great in Minnesota.

cold hands,
thanks for the tit flash, babe.

kendra,
you would have made a great coach, too.

johnny,
they have too much money to hire a sucky coach, I'm afraid.

dr. c,
git-r-done!

tits,
I don't think all (or even most) Kentucky fans are white nationalists, but that was a funny and disturbing link just the same.

jeannie,
I don't know. Perhaps someone from Lexington will explain it to you.

brooke,
"Excuse me while I whip this out."

john,
Chef's dad on South Park couldn't have said it better.

Blogger yournamehere said...

j. pick,
thank you for the unsolicited regurgitation of UK statistics.

Here's the deal, pal...NO ONE outside of the state of Kentucky gives a running fuck about University of Kentucky basketball, their delusional fan base, or their so-called "rightful position atop the nation." If Jeannie, for example, thinks basketball was invented in Canada, do you think she cares how many 10-loss seasons Tubby had?
This is NOT a sports blog. I only posted about this incident because of the funny picture associated with it; and that's the only reason anyone commented.
Except for you, of course. You had to rub our noses in the carpet stain that is your false sense of entitlement, with an added glimpse ("sports is about winning, period") at your appalling lack of perspective.
Oh, and no one outside of the city cares about the University of Louisville. Since I'm not delusional, I realize this.

Blogger yournamehere said...

j. post,

I say in my reply to other comments that I don't think most UK fans are racist, but whatever.

Since I'm not sure you read my entire post, allow me to provide an excerpt:

"...he got sick of being criticized, harassed, even threatened, because he didn't win a National Championship every year; so he quit, and took the same job at Minnesota."

Yes, the reason I gave for his being fired is THE SAME REASON YOU GIVE IN YOUR ORIGINAL COMMENT. The Kentucky fanbase, who thinks it's their birthright to win a championship every year, didn't like Tubby because he allegedly underperformed.

Your rabid overreaction to a stranger's blog - a blog of no relevance, in fact - does more to stereotype UK fans than any words I'll ever write. You're blowing ass water on your own kind with this "our rightful position" horseshit.

If you want to believe that anyone outside of this state is losing any sleep over who the next coach at Kentucky is going to be, that's fine. (The exception being fans of the coaches who might leave to go there).

Now, since you obviously hate my blog, I don't expect to see your comments on it ever again. If you want to defend Kentucky or badmouth Louisville, please do so on your own blog. I realize no one reads your blog, but it does belong to you. This blog does not.

Blogger yournamehere said...

j. pick,
I am not against debate. If you'd like to attack me further, please do so at: www.damnwasteoftime.blogspot.com

Blogger la dolce said...

lol, I wore my UNLV sweatshirt out grocery shopping today and so many people stopped to talk to me about the game. Seattle people are so friendly :)

Poor Rebs :(

Blogger Scarlet Hip said...

Q: What's long and hard on a University of Kentucky basketball player?

A: First grade

Blogger Fella said...

I would just like to point out that Basketball was, in fact, invented in Canada.

Blogger Tits McGee said...

For the record, the inventor of basketball, James Naismith, was born in Canada, but invented the sport in Springfield, MA. So there, suckas.

Blogger Ubermilf said...

Hey Todd, I'm going on vacation next week. Can you cover for me? Please write about Louisville basketball so we can attract a cross section of loonies, both yours and mine.

Blogger Princess Pointful said...

Wow.
I am totally impressed that this post invited the most debate out of what I have read from you so far.
I'm also impressed that some fans (of course, not all UK fans, because I would hate to make such atrocious stereotypes) recognize that wites are probablie the entire reason basketball has such pizazz.
Oh, and Canadians.
(I'm one so I'm allowed to make fun)

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