The most satisfying beer ever

On New Year's Eve, I worked at the store from 9am-6pm. I'd say it was a zoo, but zoos have a more pleasant smell and less screeching from knuckle-dragging apes. I was meeting friends for dinner at 7, so I left work and drove to the restaurant's parking lot.

A coworker had given me a bottle of Fat Tire (not available in Louisville) that he brought back from St. Louis, so I sat in my car and enjoyed the beer. But most enjoyable of all was the silence, the sanity-restoring lack of noise. For the past month I've been pummeled by the sounds of stupidity. I've had a lifetime's supply of cranky old men, weaselly underage douchebags, keg-sucking fratfucks, young women who get mad when they're asked for ID, old women who get mad when they aren't asked for ID, vagrants who smell of meth fumes and regret, pushy type-A's who sigh dramatically if one person is ahead of them in line, unsupervised children, and crazy ass motherfuckers. It was a nonstop din of humanity's lesser lights.

God damn, did I enjoy drinking that beer without having to hear anyone flap his or her pud pleasers. Without that time by myself, I don't think I would have enjoyed the rest of the evening nearly as much.

I hope everyone has a great 2008. Unless you plan on running for president on the Republican ticket, in which case I hope your 2008 is a series of failures that eventually leads to your public suicide.